### Dreams 🧫 1. There was a presentation/performance but the chimes broke, instead play air harmonica (not a literal harmonica but a new air-powered instrument that had rings being vibrated by the wind) by an old lady assistant of Willy Wonka. We all thought she was brilliant because it was an ad hoc instrument that was new and she instantly knew how to play it skillfully. 2. Assistant who was replaced Westworld/Twilight lady (Angela Sarafyan) “dead-alive in lust” (there was this macabre part where she was visualized as dead-alive) requested to play the chimes but she was also Willy Wonka. 1. The name **Angela** is a classic female given name of Greek and Latin origin, meaning **"angel"** or **"messenger of God."** It derives from the Greek word _angelos_ (messenger) and the Latin term _angelus_. [[1](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/angela), [2](https://www.etymonline.com/word/Angela)] 2. The **Sarafyan** (often spelled **Sarafian**) last name is of **Armenian** origin, typically functioning as a patronymic or occupational surname. It derives from the Arabic and Persian word _saraf_ (or _ṣarrāf_), which translates to **money changer or banker**. [[1](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarafian), [2](https://lastnames.myheritage.com/last-name/sarafyan)] 3. Sheloah fight with her sister, Shuthelah, and Tryphena Moreh Liñan. Getting Vico’s attention to no avail in a school program-type where I felt invisible. 1. The name **Shuthelah** is of Hebrew origin and appears in the Bible as the name of a son of Ephraim. Its primary meanings translate to **"crash of breakage," "noise of breaking,"** or **"tumult of the breach"**. [[1](https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/h7803/web/wlc/0-1/), [2](https://www.truthunity.net/mbd/shuthelah), [3](https://kingjamesbibledictionary.com/StrongsNo/H7803/Shuthelah)] 2. The name **Shiloah** (pronounced _shi-LO-ah_) is a Hebrew name that translates to **"peaceful,"** **"tranquil,"** or **"His gift"**. It is a variant of the more commonly known name **Shiloh**. [[1](https://kiindred.co/baby-name/shiloah-f/), [2](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/shilo), [3](https://www.thebump.com/b/shilo-baby-name)] 3. The surname **Seriña** is a localized variant of the Italian and Spanish surname **Serina** or **Serena**. Rooted in the Latin word _serenus_, it roughly translates to **"serene," "calm," or "tranquil."** [[1](https://www.ancestry.com/last-name-meaning/serina), [2](https://www.ancestry.com.au/last-name-meaning/serena?srsltid=AfmBOorL6pbEUIyWLWWmWWIXzWAXbgsAbKUK4MR0NYPZx18G-SIy90AI), [3](https://www.thebump.com/b/serina-baby-name), [4](https://www.thebump.com/b/sereena-baby-name), [5](https://www.thebump.com/b/seraina-baby-name)] 4. The name **Tryphena** is of **Greek origin** and means **"delicate," "dainty,"** or **"softness."** It is derived from the ancient Greek word _tryphe_, which translates to living luxuriously, gracefully, or delicately. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/tryphena-baby-name), [2](https://biblehub.com/topical/t/tryphena.htm), [3](https://www.jw.org/en/library/books/Insight-on-the-Scriptures/Tryphaena/)] 5. The name **Moreh** has roots in multiple languages, with meanings spanning from **"teacher" and "stretching" in Hebrew to a communal post-prayer meal during Ramadan in Arabic/Malay**. [[1](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/moreh), [2](https://www.ancient-hebrew.org/ancient-words/ancient-hebrew-words-throw-torah-and-teacher.htm), [3](https://www.facebook.com/groups/630510135259701/posts/792505719060141/)] 1. Derived from the Hebrew verb _yara_ (meaning to cast, shoot, or throw), Moreh translates to **"teacher," "guide,"** or **"archer."** [[1](https://www.ancient-hebrew.org/ancient-words/ancient-hebrew-words-throw-torah-and-teacher.htm), [2](https://www.abarim-publications.com/Meaning/Moreh.html)] 2. **As a Person or Place:** In the Bible, Moreh is a Canaanite oak grove near Shechem where Abraham stopped and built his first altar. 3. **Symbolism:** Metaphysically, it signifies a **"teachable state of mind"** or a person who inspires others in a higher cause. [[1](https://www.allbabynames.com/m/BabyName/Biblical/Moreh.aspx), [2](https://christiananswers.net/dictionary/moreh.html), [3](https://classic.net.bible.org/dictionary.php?word=Moreh), [4](https://www.truthunity.net/mbd/moreh)] 6. The name **Liñán** (pronounced _lee-NYAHN_) is a notable Spanish surname of Andalusian origin. Though its literal etymology is often classified as unexplained or obscure, it is **most commonly believed to derive from a geographical feature or early Spanish agrarian roots connected to the word _lin_ (flax)**. [[1](https://www.familysearch.org/en/surname?surname=Linan), [2](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Li%C3%B1%C3%A1n), [3](https://lastnames.myheritage.com/last-name/linan_linan), [4](https://lastnames.myheritage.com/last-name/pastor_linan), [5](https://www.ancestry.com/last-name-meaning/linan)] 7. Interpretation: so it’s directly telling me that Vico is Tryphena in this dream? And that Shuthelah is me as an Isa (two opposing natures—noise+peace like how Isa is made of ACCOIYO and BATANY), and that Sheloah is John John (has double peace in her name). Who is Tryphena the teacher going to choose? Vico being a professor according to his plans. Or that Tryphena is a pointer to Mark Cayanan or darlingdaintyfoot on Instagram. I re-read a passage of my diary yesterday talking about Darling Rare Earth so maybe this has something to do with that. Darling’s post about Rare Earth, or Mark Cayanan really posting about that student’s poems called Rare Earth. So it’s still about Darling Dainty Foot. 1. It’s such a synchronicity for Sheloah to be named doubly like that. It’s no wonder why I keep having Sheloah dreams. Double names do matter to God for some reason. 4. Carlos swimming pool fight with me with Chloe in the background. I think we were fighting about beauty, as I really mentioned something about tattoo eyebrows. A swimming pool above ground overlooking another swimming pool. There were these microbots that looked like the color of my Billie Eilish perfume—bronze balls that are voice controllable. The owner made people see it in action by telling them to lift themselves and throw themselves into the pool and return back to the aboveground pool. 5. Another dream where I was putting on this giant menstrual pad on a hanger and Alizeiah was there and I was pretty conscious of the smell because it looked pretty full as if I was collecting blood on it. 6. Another dream with Joshua Olorocisimo where I was sitting on his lap (not exactly, but my back was close to his chest and we were so close that I could feel the heartbeat in his package and I could tell he was getting hard. It was so hot. I want to feel someone getting hard for me. ### Ruminations 🩻 1. So Phylicia Masonheimer has responded to me and she still doesn’t believe me, I can tell. Please God, if women don’t believe me at this point, how are men in theology going to believe me? I need more power in this regard. Remind me to respond to her using her sex-related work. In ISA’s name, amen. 1. Respond to Phylicia as if your Trinity is meant to be a clarification of the Trinity, not a replacement, but that my language with “middle way” between Christianity and secular atheism is because I wanted philosophers to be able to see the structure of the Trinity more clearly and why it’s fundamental to reality even if they might not resonate with the Trinity theory/mystery itself. 2. Lord, I don’t like the responses to my TLS right now. None of them are really hitting it because they don’t believe me at all. I need to find a believer ASAP. I’m really sorry God, I just wish I convinced people right now instead of having to have institutional weight with Berggruen. Why are people so biased??????????? Your human creations are so frustrating right now. Nobody has any shred of faith that I could be right. In ISA’s name, amen. 3. Lord, I also pray that my persistence pays off with actually praying for the people I might send TLS to before Victory Day. I pray that You open their hearts because the Bible says nothing is impossible with You. Lord, I see how important institutions are, and please correct my paths and errors in TLS if it is still erroneous fatally towards convincing theologians and skeptics alike. Lord, I myself don’t understand their resistance because I’m already so biased by your revelations to me, and I see that they’ve had no such revelations for themselves to really see sense in my framework. Lord, I beg of You to please give them revelations of their own as they try my methods for themselves even though I hate them pre-emptively for being doubting Thomases. Lord, may You turn my doubting Thomases into the most ardent believers someday. Make their shock great and humble them too, oh God, because they cannot see sense if it slammed into them in the highway. In ISA’s name, amen. 4. Lord, I don’t know about Sheloah/Shuthelah dream, but I feel that You are giving me a choice, between being pope and being married. If yes, and if my choice is taken into account, I would much prefer to be married, God, truly. I would have to sacrifice a lot, maybe have my sons and daughters continue the work, if it will also mean that I will be mortal. Lord, I know my legacy will partly change the world, and I truly don’t expect it to be too fast now that I’m encountering resistance (it’s not for this time, I guess), but I wish there was some way I could do both elegantly and efficiently, be a philosopher, be a mother, and a tech co-founder probably in my forties after my children have grown up a bit. Please, God, but I would rather be married than to pursue a career as a cofounder. I feel it is easier in my constitution to be a homemaker and a writer at the same time than to be a world-changing philosopher. I suppose my children can continue my work if they want. I’m truly prepared to make that sacrifice, God. I may be more obscure than I like in this life, but I would be married and happy. Lord, please take this into account. I may feel like I’m meant for big things and renown but I also want to slow down and not be shocked or dissociate because of the glory. The glory needs to be distributed, I think. And it’s going to start with a Berggruen win. God, help me to work my ass off indeed, because I cannot do it alone as my own naturally low-dopamine self. It’s for my and everyone else’s safety that my dopamine remain low. Lord, maybe I’ll only end up like Suzanne Collins with a YouTube channel and then I’ll release my book someday. Lord, please also help me organize my diary online to the best of my ability. I feel like it’s my fulcrum too. To be able to convince people by then that I am a real deal Parousia. In ISA’s name, amen. 5. Lord, I’m sorry because I’m just so impatient today. I don’t know how to quell this anxiety—although it’s not reached high levels just yet. Here’s me just wishing I still felt seen by Vico more. You’re right giving me that dream. I’m just unmoored because right now I feel really invisible to him, like the magic is just about gone. I wish he would post a love song just so I can daydream again. I don’t really know where this anxiety is coming from, God. Just being impatient, just wishing the days would pass quicker to calm me down and reassure me that everything’s going to work out just as I’d hoped. I just wish I got a taste of it more, God. But I know I should trust in Your timing, and please do not give to me what I cannot handle just yet. In ISA’s name, amen. 6. Lord, I don’t know what to do right now. I know my Saturdays and Sundays should be reserved for rest but I’m really out of leisure activities that could put my restless mind to rest. Please help me rest in You, God. I feel like doing nothing but I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts. I feel like I’m just waiting until bedtime because being awake and being conscious is a bit too tiring for me these days—the pressure from being Your servant who has to do world-changing work being one of the greatest weights on my shoulders right now. I don’t know what to do about it except to just wait it out, God. Please help me truly rest so I can recover mental energy for next week’s work, God. In ISA’s name, amen. 7. “A drag path etched on the surface as evidence I left there on purpose.” Drag Path makes me cry today. I really hope people will read my diary since I worked so hard on it, God. I can’t wait to claim Your promise of my views being doubly productive. In Your time, God. 8. Lord, I think a solution to my panic would be to give me more pride and confidence, indeed. Only, I don’t know how you would do that. If only there was some way I could take pride in my achievements so far. I don’t realize I’m living in an oasis at the moment being panicky right now when I’m mostly done with my Berggruen hopefully award-winning story. Lord, thank You for that. Only, I can’t claim that I did anything special with it at all. That’s the curse(?) with being Your servant, because I genuinely think my actions are not at all too conscious and that I just go with the flow. Help me God to ride this talent wave sometimes so I give Your glory regardless if I actually plan things to work out to the letter. Give me more confidence and pride in my own abilities and current achievements, and help me see my own beauty. In ISA’s name, amen. 9. Lord, I’m sorry, I realize that the Sheloah dream may be another Abraham test about where my loyalties lie. If so, and if it’s not my choice at all, then I strive to follow Your will for me God, if everything will lead to me being ISA representative on Earth and to not marry anyone at all. I will accept that sacrifice when it comes down to it, even if it kills me. But please, God, please take into account my heart’s desire too. You already know. In ISA’s name, amen.