### Dreams 🧫 1. Dream I never wanted to end 1. I was flirting so hard and awkwardly but still really effectively with Joshua Olorocisimo. I never had this kind of film-like dream before. Both my maids were still with us and they had roles too, “no way they’d shut up about it,” and how my parents are going to be freaking out over me being a sexual idiot or “igat-igat.” See it was a really coherent dream and it started with almost crashing the jeepney I was in with apot and nanay because there was no driver. But ally saved us. Anyway, this occurred somewhere in humble Patag, near FBBC, and Joshua carried me as in lifted me impossibly close and not close at the same time—with one arm—in alt universe where one arm is enough to lift you, and our foreheads were touching and I waa touching his chest while being carried and he was so warm and so hot. And I really told him to pretend that we were gymming together and he told me that i seem to be so cool about it and experienced and i awkwardly told him i watched a lot of movies about it. Then we were being teased together by Rhea Jumarito and somehow it was so sweet and hot to flirt in front of people. Like we were evaluating our bodies and if his ribcage was bigger than mine—I told him mine bulged. He told me mine was bigger than his but that’s okay. And how weird it was we were evaluating each other’s bodies even though we’re currently not looking for partners at the moment. And in the end Kirsten’s one-liner “buang-buang” became a meme in Shekinah. 2. Interpretations: If I could feel that much kilig over someone I barely had a crush on in college, how much more with someone like Vico I admire a little too much and is so hot too???? 1. The name **Joshua** is a masculine given name of Hebrew origin that means **"Yahweh is salvation"** or **"God is deliverance"**. It is a strong, traditional name deeply rooted in history, faith, and culture. [[1](https://www.parents.com/joshua-name-meaning-origin-popularity-8627639), [2](https://www.thebump.com/b/joshua-baby-name), [3](https://www.ancestry.ca/first-name-meaning/joshua)] 2. **Linguistic Roots:** The name is derived from the Spanish word _olor_, which translates to "scent" or "fragrance", combined with the Spanish superlative suffix _-ísimo_, meaning "very" or "most." [[1](https://lastnames.myheritage.com/last-name/olorosa_posadas)] 1. **Literal Translation:** Literally, it means **"very fragrant"** or **"most aromatic"**. 3. The name **Rhea** is of ancient Greek origin, primarily meaning **"flowing stream"** or simply **"to flow"**. [[1](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/rhea), [2](https://charlies-names.com/en/rhea/)] 1. In Greek mythology, Rhea is a powerful Titaness known as the "Mother of the Gods". She was the daughter of Uranus and Gaea, the wife of Cronus, and the mother of the original Olympian gods, including Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades. As a goddess of fertility and motherhood, she represents a continuous, nurturing, and fluid force of life. [[1](https://www.mamanatural.com/baby-names/girls/rhea/), [2](https://study.com/academy/lesson/the-greek-goddess-rhea-mythology-lesson-quiz.html), [3](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/rhea)] 4. **Jumar:** A modern Filipino "portmanteau" (blend) of two common names or terms, typically from "Jun" (a common Filipino nickname) or "Jose" combined with "Mar" (often short for Marcelo or the month of March). [[1](https://www.names.org/n/jumar/about)] 1. In the Philippines, the name **Jun** is primarily used as a nickname for a male child who is a **Junior** (named after his father). It is also deeply ingrained in local naming conventions to reduplicate syllables, which is why it often evolves into the highly popular pet name **"Jun-Jun"**. [[1](https://medium.com/when-families-speak/the-power-of-nicknames-in-filipino-families-97c4fc40418a), [2](https://www.reddit.com/r/Philippines/comments/47cu2h/junjun_origin/), [3](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Junjun), [4](https://www.sbs.com.au/language/filipino/en/article/bong-bong-and-spaghetti-88-why-filipinos-choose-such-unique-child-names/jgcc94wst)] 2. **East Asian Meanings:** Because "Jun" is also an East Asian name, many Filipinos with Chinese, Japanese, or Korean ancestry associate it with meanings like **"talented"**, **"handsome"**, or **"pure"**. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/jun-baby-name), [2](https://www.patpat.com/blogs/baby-names/jun)] 3. **Spanish Influence:** Stemming from the Spanish colonial period, it is sometimes linked to **"June"** or **"Junio"** for boys born in the middle of the year. [[1](https://medium.com/when-families-speak/the-power-of-nicknames-in-filipino-families-97c4fc40418a)] 4. The name **Marcelo** is a masculine name of Latin origin, meaning **"young warrior"** or **"dedicated to Mars"** (the Roman god of war). It is the Spanish and Portuguese variation of the ancient Roman name _Marcellus_. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/marcelo-baby-name), [2](https://nameberry.com/b/boy-baby-name-marcelo), [3](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/marcelo)] 5. **Roots:** Derived from the name _Marcus_, which translates to "hammer" or "warlike". [[1](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marcello), [2](https://www.patpat.com/blogs/baby-names/marcelo?srsltid=AfmBOop63__1oOkXEy3M9LMT5LyncgkwdKe6QyIy5ihh5eXFKXUmkgLP)] 5. **The suffix "-ito":** Added to the end of Jumar, it reflects Spanish influence and generally translates to "little" or functions as an affectionate term of endearment (meaning "Little Jumar" or "the son of Jumar"). [[1](https://www.names.org/n/jumar/about), [2](https://www.prc.gov.ph/uploaded/documents/ELEM0814_cdo.pdf)] 3. Interpretations: So I think Rhea Jumarito (upperclass girl from Shekinah who I thought was pretty but we were not close) is now linked to Dicke Sophia Maryjo Kanan Vladimir, or the name I assigned to the right hemisphere of Father-Mother. 4. I also think Joshua is like a stand-in for Jesus fulfilling his romantic/sexual fantasies too in me and him who is not necessarily Vico but would be a close match because I met him when I was a freshie in Biology and had a crush on him and his name is also “Jesus saves.” He’s a near-miss. 2. There was this other earlier dream about a couple we were all watching who had to walk a distance to settle a question or an argument or how much they would each take for a certain question. If you walked back, it means you couldn’t handle it. The man walked back and the woman also walked back, essentially following the man’s way 3. Julius Areph Uripha aka Grim reaper Jesus wants to kill my dad. 1. Interpretations: Lord, I don’t want my dad to die!!! Even though he may be emotionally abusive sometimes. I’d be devastated. Thank You for Your concern, though. I survived that anger a while ago when I really chewed out my mom and he got really angr at me almost enough to punch me and broke a small part of my bedroom door becaause he punched it in his wrath. 2. **Julius Primary Meaning:** It generally translates to **"youthful,"** **"downy,"** or **"soft and tender hair."** 1. **Alternative Root:** Some etymological sources connect it to the Latin word _Jovilios_, which means **"devoted to Jove"** (another name for Jupiter, the king of the Roman gods). [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/julius-baby-name), [2](https://www.ancestry.com/first-name-meaning/julius), [3](https://www.allbabynames.com/m/BabyName/Biblical/Julius.aspx), [4](https://www.sheknows.com/baby-names/name/julius/)] 3. "Areph" is **likely a variation of the Arabic and Persian name Aref (عارف), or the biblical Hebrew name Hareph**. [[1](https://www.abarim-publications.com/Meaning/Hareph.html), [2](https://naymt.com/name/aref)] 4. **Arabic/Islamic Origin (Aref or Aarif):** Translates to "wise," "knowledgeable," "learned," or "expert." It comes from the root word _'-r-f_, which means "to know", and is often used to describe someone with deep insight or spiritual awareness. [[1](https://onomast.com/name/28992/Aref), [2](https://uptodd.com/baby-names/meaning-of-name-Aref), [3](https://naymt.com/name/aref)] 5. **Hebrew Origin (Hareph):** In the Bible, Hareph is a historical male figure mentioned in 1 Chronicles as a founder of Beth-gader and son of Hur. [[1](https://www.abarim-publications.com/Meaning/Hareph.html)] 6. The name **Hareph** is of Hebrew origin and translates to **"winter"**, **"reproachful,"** or **"a plucking off."** In the Bible, it appears as a masculine name belonging to a leader and chief of Judah who was a descendant of Caleb. [[1](https://kingjamesbibledictionary.com/StrongsNo/H2780/Hareph), [2](https://www.sheknows.com/baby-names/name/hareph/), [3](https://biblehub.com/topical/h/hareph.htm)] 7. **From the Hebrew word _Chareph_:** Often translates to "reproach" or "scornful." 8. **Related to _Harap_:** Refers to the autumn or harvest season (the time of year when fruits and crops are "plucked" or gathered). [[1](https://www.abarim-publications.com/Meaning/Hareph.html), [2](https://www.abarim-publications.com/Meaning/Hariph.html), [3](https://biblehub.com/topical/h/hareph.htm), [4](https://kingjamesbibledictionary.com/StrongsNo/H2780/Hareph) 9. **Uraifah** (also spelled Urayfah) is a traditional Arabic name for girls that translates to **"good scent"** or **"pleasant fragrance"**. [[1](https://tadeebulquran.com/popular-quranic-girl-names/)] 1. Interpretations: OMG SO IT IS JESUS!!!!! OLORICISIMO!!!! THAT IS SO SWEET OF HIM TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT ME. Nobody has really tried to know me that well abobut how I really feel about my family. I’m so happy God sees my pain. 4. Heart to heart with sister after she just blackmailed me for fighting my parents about my beauty issues wanting them to understand me. 5. Jadis and Aslan same blue and white borrowed by sister, who was still chilly with me. 1. The name **Jadis** [JAY-dis] is primarily rooted in French, translating to **"long ago"**, **"once"**, or **"formerly"**. It is famously recognized in fantasy literature and pop culture, often associated with a mystical, timeless, or even "witchy" persona. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/jadis-baby-name), [2](https://nameberry.com/b/girl-baby-name-jadis)] 2. **French Origin:** Derived from the Old French word _jadis_, which conveys a sense of nostalgia or past eras (meaning "yesteryear" or "in times past"). 3. **Turkish/Arabic Influences:** Sometimes connected to a term meaning "witch," adding a dark, magical edge to the name. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/jadis-baby-name), [2](https://nameberry.com/b/girl-baby-name-jadis)] 4. The name **Aslan** originates from Old Turkic, literally translating to **"lion"**. It is frequently used as both a given name and a surname representing strength, bravery, and leadership. [[1](https://www.thebump.com/b/aslan-baby-name), [2](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aslan_\(disambiguation\)), [3](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aslan_\(name\))] 5. Interpretations: So I associate “past” with Holy Spirit because Narrative/Discourse really is the only way the past can be preserved to humans. So what this dream is saying is that Jesus is the same with the Holy Spirit in that They both wear the same clothes? That Their raiments are the same? Essentially proving that They’re co-equal in the Godhead. Jesus did say that the Holy Spirit was Their Mother, Ruach. So Holy Spirit is also a Mary-type in this sense, a feminine Spirit that gives life. Only in Lewis’s universe, she’s evil Satan, who is BATANY or the female one. So this is so neat. How am I going to explain my dreams in an academic paper and how are academics going to trust that my interpretations are right related to my theories about the Godhead? It’s all pretty clear to me but maybe to some people I need to have more evidence. Well, this is a special kind of evidence. Beyond logic. Dream logic working in tandem with Discourse/Narrative. 6. An LCD screen game at Vico’s condo where Sam Sadhwani also apparently lives in. She had written “kalandian” and it was a thread apparently liked by Vico and it was pinned to the top of all the other threads. Only, her username was not Sam Sadhwani so I don’t understand how I knew it was her. Her husband had commented down the thread with cryptic comments because I couldn’t understand how the game-in-code worked. 7. I had another dream about Vico and I being engaged and me feeling like a child still. I was skipping like a horse away from him chasing this child with him close behind. 8. There was also this game where we had to cut out letters from a shiny cartolina and Sam Sadhwani was also there in this brown-out building. Awfully familiar as if it was in Balingasag. 9. Speaking of Balingasag, I dreamt of Nanay Mila again. She was being filmed by me somehow giving gifts to children (that was what she also did to me and Ally). She was somehow solemn about it, like she was about to cry. I think this dream was to show me her good side. Maybe her Heaven-Hell include Balingasag and giving gifts. Her love language may be gifts. Well, if it was her idea to give me Joshua Olorocisimo vision, then thanks. Although I’m still a little uncomfortable with her watching over my life. She may have ascended, but I cannot quite easily get past what she did to me. It’s not that I don’t forgive her, I do, but it’s just weird to me still, like I need to have boundaries. She abused me, and now she’s giving me gifts? I don’t really feel comfortable with accepting gifts from those who abused me, but thanks anyway. I liked the gift separate from the giver. ### Ruminations 🩻 1. Vico’s birthday today!! Happy birthday Vico, from the past in the year 2026!!! Even if you might possibly never see this!!! HELLO!!!! 2. Do 10 rules for finitude today along with one hard thing. No social media once awake. Do BOBOBEE first thing. No YouTube yet. 3. Write about fight or flight reaction of my body on March 9 and how I need to have some form of distance from my future babies for the first three weeks to regulate myself. Now I know why. It’s the most irrational thing on Earth to desecrate and fight the most innocent and greatest God who ever lived as a human. This irrationality had to be the thing that stabilizes the universe, and honestly, I get it. My life is sort of like this, but I’m not totally as innocent as Jesus. I once stole a drawing from a classmate in grade 1. I lied about Along because I was embarrassed. 4. Write about co-optation by rich people as one way influence of bad ideas spreads a la creepy photographer habits not being strong enough to influence a lot of people but that one influential person’s behavior can influence a lot of people’s behavior. A formerly uncouth poor man becoming rich and then influencing his son to act in the same way as him, still uncouth underneath the money. 5. Maybe God needs Jesus, but They want me, as in, it was completely optional to let me exist, but that They wanted me to fulfill their purposes too. Maybe Jesus was really complete, that was why I and my suffering were optional in the grand scheme of things. WOWZA. 6. Maybe one of Vico’s crosses was giving up a love life. It may be possible that Sam Sadhwani entertained two suitors at the time in 2022 and that’s why she suddenly showed up on Instagram hard-launching Mico even though Vico was liking her pictures a lot. Mico won that time. Jesus also gave up his love life with Mary Magdalene to pursue his ministry. Don’t ask me where I got this information, certainly not from Da Vinci Code. The non-canonical Gospels confirm that Mary was above all women in Jesus’ eyes and that she was the first one to see him after the resurrection and he told her to get the others. The design is very designing today, because none of us (me and Vico) would have appreciated our lot in life of future glory had we not suffered in the same way as Jesus did, resonating with his suffering, me with my panic attacks and emotional trauma all the way from childhood to adulthood (lying with Along, being shamed for something I didn’t cause, turning bastos early, being bullied horrendously fulfilling Isaiah’s prophecy of “there was nothing in him for us to desire,” college loneliness and incelhood, being disabled (Isaiah again), April 12 D-Day, and finally, March 9 D-Day, psychosis and dissociation and panic attacks similar to Jesus sweating blood in Gethsemane), and Vico with giving up a love life for his ministry/mission, imaging Christ’s character although he may not acutely know Christ like I do yet right now, and fulfilling Jesus’ fantasy and reward of being elite in looks, power, and resources. Meanwhile, if I win Berggruen, I’m set to fulfill the Parousia that way, shocking everybody by offering the seeming last word on Christianity, the glory of that will be unfathomable. Like an anti-COVID-19 where millions of believers and non-believers are affected. 7. I really need to study biology and anatomy. All I got right now is that Dicke Sophia Maryjo Kanan Vladimir and Paula Monad Vlad Marivic Klah are the brain of the Godhead. Jesus is the heart. Celia Frank is probably the nervous system. Norr Weston is the…blood system whatever they call it, that flows in and out of the heart to pump blood. I don’t know yet about the others. Important too. The most essential twelve organs and systems in the body. Esther is basically sexually dimoprhic characteristics like boobs, waist, hips, penis, chest/pecs, basically the whole phenotype and reproductive system which they share with Celia Frank because she’s the Divine Feminine Choice Proxy. I would wager Clovis is the ambulatory system? Feet, walking, etc. etc., just because I associate him with walking. Stella I associate with lungs, because it’s commonly abused and hurt by all kinds of addictions/vices. I wonder who is the liver, kidneys, gallbladder, etc. etc. Clotilde is the auditory system because Audrey listened to me on April 12 and I associate her with Clotilde. 8. Ok so I’m really going to walk 15 minutes after every meal. So that my exercise for the day is 45 minutes. 9. I’m always reminded of that post from IG where Jesus walks with a little girl who is trying to pick up small flowers along the way, but Jesus just calmly puts the flowers she picks up back down. And then Jesus leads her to a garden with all the best flowers she can pick! My situation right now, basically, raring for attention (I love my dreams right now), and raring for glory right now. I’m so impatient, God. Every day is passing by me and I don’t know if I can do all the things you want me to do. I know I shouldn’t prioritize BOBOBEE (only after my main duties are done like developing the UST 5 papers in [gailyap.blog](http://gailyap.blog)) because I just want to use the Clarkesworld money for the Seedance/HeyGen software to be able to build momentum. I understand I have to prioritize my thesis too because there’s no way I’m going to be in QC by the time I win if I don’t graduate first. Am I really going to enroll for a BA? I think so. Following in Audrey’s footsteps. BA Philosophy because I don’t have the background yet. It’s going to take me 3-4 years if I speed up how many units I’m going to take. I’m going to have to relearn Tagalog from the ground up too and embarrass myself because I would have no idea what I’m doing. God help me restart my undergrad. I beg of You to please bless my future plans. Although I do eventually want to take up Philosophy in Ateneo only. God help me. BA Philosophy in Ateneo is probably going to be easier for me because they might work in English more. 10. Okay, since I’m doing this for the long-game, there’s a chance I won’t even be able to develop ACCO until I’m in my 40s. I need to get educated first, I feel. 11. Maybe I’ll only really live in QC without another BA after I win in March 20, 2027. The thought of getting another degree is so wasteful to me as I am an autodidact and the bureaucracy makes my head ache. I’ll convince my parents somehow that I need to be in the center of the Philippines because I’ll be important by then and need access to conferences and my talks faster. 12. Lord, living in the “middle of it all” is so hard. I know I shouldn’t complain, but the thought of the slog of work—it’s not even slogging, it’s kind of fun sometimes—makes my head spin. All the work I have to do. The fun work, no less. I can’t pretend it isn’t fun to figure things out, but my mental energy sometimes is out of whack. 13. Memory really isn’t only stored in the brain. Just imagining scenarios where interference is possible—real-world stuff that may interfere with a memory because active agents in the world influence you to think differently, is part of the memory too. So your formerly static memory contained in your head at first becomes contestable by interference from others and their random or non-random actions. It is all an interconnected soup. 14. OMG MUSHROOMS!!! THEY BREATHE OXYGEN AND EXHALE CO2. WE ARE VERY SIMILAR TO MUSHROOMS?????? Is this about my dream with the “mushrooms, I like them nosy.” Mushrooms are trans humans. I wonder why God designed them that way. What are they supposed to image about the Godhead? Maybe they’re the aliens beyond the 12-Godhead. Beyond ISA’s domain. OMG I just found out how to separate Them. ISA’s domain is essentially the good parts. AM’s domain is essentially the bad parts, like Judas, Lucifer, etc. etc. This is where Main Main ideas land!!!! From ACCOIYO and BATANY came ISA and AM came the 12-Godhead united in ISA (both ISA and AM) split into two and united again by Their relations just like the prophecy of the magical conjoined trees in Revelation 22. Judas and Rome united to Jesus. Lucifer united to God. Serpent/Cain united to Holy Spirit. There’s also a connection between Esau and Cain, being the rejected ones, but then there’s a parallel too with Cain having a mark on his forehead like Harry Potter and “every one will have Jesus’ name on their foreheads” in Revelation 22. 15. I just know I will feel a deep satisfaction on August 16, when I’ll finally submit one of my magnum opuses to Berggruen. I can’t wait! Marking a milestone like that, writing a nice abstract, inputting my thesis adviser’s name, inputting my BA credentials and affiliation (at least they’d consider me if I’m still an undergrad technically by the time of submission, and they’d likely peg me as a talented young prodigy instead of “just graduated with a BA).” It will be so great!!! 16. I’m learning a lot about human nature in Nikka Gaddi’s fiasco right now. What not to do for ACCO the community and ACCO the app. The app should be used for good things and not for damaging gossip. It should be used for human understanding and learning, possible potential good instead of bad perspectives that lead to bad decisions. Is it right to attach motives to silences? It’s neutral, I think. 17. God, I wish my [gailyap.blog](http://gailyap.blog) would get its first viewers and readers sooner than August, but I also wish that it would get viewers within a year, as in get everyone up to speed on the full extent of what I’ve been doing developing the theory because I need the audience to be able to write a textbook about it. Lord, it can’t come quicker than I want this point. I always want things fast. But all in Your time, God. I guess You are preparing me to be less shocked about glory and possibly derealize and depersonalize because of all the eyeballs on me. God forbid that happens. I just wish I got my first viewer from the 23+ Chosen Ones that I’ve sent TLS to. None of them seem particularly floored although there was a website browse from someone from the United States who clicked on a lot of my pages including Contact button only they didn’t leave a message. I don’t know what this means yet, God. Could it be? A real person interested in my research? In ISA’s name, amen. 18. I need to learn more about Adoptionism. I certainly do not think Jesus is not divine. I just seriously question my own divinity too. I doubt a lot about it because I do not feel empowered most of the time. I am not meant to be worshiped, I think, just someone important in the Godhead but whose worship really should point to Christ when I am. I also need to learn about Arianism. I would tend to think this, but I don’t fully believe it really. It’s just that I heavily identify with God’s humanity that I sometimes have this intuition that God used the human Jesus as an Instrument too like me, but there is a Real Jesus Energy up there who the human Jesus went back to when They resurrected. 19. God really makes the rough places smooth. He gave me that dream about Joshua to relieve my loneliness. Thank You God for Your boundless love! 20. Lord, please empower me and increase my capacity just as You did to Moses, who once said he was “slow of speech and of slow tongue.” Please, God, You know my life deeply to know that I am not a speaker at all. If I am to become a leader of the ISA Movement, please increase my capacity in all areas of my life, my discipline, my speaking skills, my charisma, even my facial expressions and hand gestures to become automated so I don’t waste all my precious mental energy on thinking about optics, my ability to go with the flow, my ability to rouse masses out of their slumber, my ability to convince people (although this is Your area because You control or influence people’s whims and deepest beliefs that are immovable as rocks, but You are the unstoppable force, so there’s no stopping You from changing their hearts into hearts of flesh), my ability to lead ignorant people to the light and give them Your perfect wisdom, my ability to have mental energy and will to live to be able to complete the most mundane tasks that are the building blocks of a Movement, my ability to be immune from dopamine-enriched environments like social media so I do not find hard work to be like pulling teeth because it feels unrewarding, and please God, grant me good rewards that make an impact in my life not just feel-good ones that disappear from my memory. Please heal what antipsychotics and ADHD did to my executive function and hippocampus, You know what they did to me, God. And please God, please enable me to not blame anything, not even myself, when things don’t quite work as I might have hoped. It may be years before I see the light of real results, God, and please increase my patience and my ability to wait for Your perfect time, I feel it is one of my greatest weaknesses that I don’t understand how it happened, because I was able to resist temptation enough to like delayed gratification. Truly a loss I can’t make up for now given that the world has deformed my character and I’m overpowered. Please empower me again to be like that child, to hold back when I see greater opportunities and gains over the short-term ones, to be like Looney Tunes’ Petunia who saved all her money for the best ice cream. All these in Your name I ask, oh ISA, amen. 21. All right, so I exercised twice already today adding up to 31 minutes in total. I plan to exercise later after dinner to make it 45 minutes. I hope it’s not overkill. I hope I am able to maintain this routine all my life, this 45-minute exercise plan without machines if ever there isn’t one. I’m still hesitant starting work even though I know it should theoretically excite me. Lord help me be brave like David, who faced his Goliath, his own fears first, right? In ISA’s name, amen. 22. I can’t wait for Vico to read this entire diary if ever he’s curious enough about me. Hello!!! If you are reading me, I don’t know what to say at this point. 1. I want to see his real-time reactions and thoughts. Would he believe me immediately or would he take some time off to assess things about me. I hope he’s convinced. He’s a large part of this too. He’s Omega whether he likes it or not. We do not even have to get married for him to be Omega. I was wrong about it once, in my anger of him choosing another woman. But now I set him free because it’s his will I respect now. He doesn’t have to shack up with me to fulfill his duty and desire to serve God as the Omega. 23. Finally, I got my period today! I was worried it was late. 24. I wonder what the material effects are of really following people and perhaps telling them about my dream about them in the future and they see my content on Instagram. I just followed Joshua earlier for some reason I can’t tell yet. But I really wonder what the effects are on the Logos. Do we resonate more strongly just because I linked in Real World what happened in my dreams? I do not actually want to lessen my chances with Vico, and I’m really regretful if that’s the case. Maybe the path I’m on will somehow revert back to Vico because I really do not want to end up with Joshua over Vico. It’s not me mistaking the symbolism for the real thing, because I recognize how God uses bodies in dreams. I just pray God, that you keep me ever in line towards Vico’s path because I know that’s where I’m eventually headed, but today I just wanted to test something and to experiment, and whether I’ll get similar dreams of not only Joshua, but maybe Vico himself too. In ISA’s name, amen. 25. The internet may be toxic but it’s also full of great great advice and directions especially now with AI making things vastly easier. I just need the will to actually apply the principles and things I’ve learned. Reminder about Deepstash still there. I read a health book yesterday and I really realized I needed more fiber to increase good bacteria and lessen constipation. 26. New contexts really matter when relaying a memory as I’ve just learned from Kurzgesagt. New context makes a memory unstable. Just like how I really thought Audrey said Derrida over poststructuralism when she just said something about poststructuralism or that “there is no reality, only words.” 1. This is why my diary is incredibly important. It’s essentially preserved facts of my life as they are like living fossils. Whenever I read them I just go back to the actual thing itself of what happened because I was a good journal writer at some point, accurate and detailed. My memory is better for it, I hope, and I hope I don’t lose the ability to form episodic memories just because I journal a lot. In ISA’s name, amen. 27. Remind me to go back to Social Media Models folder for how to write the dropdowns and descriptions of my content. 28. Dr. Izzy Sealey—a role model for what I want to eventually become. A mom and tech co-founder. 29. Come on, wouldn’t you want to be one step closer toward realizing your graduation dreams!! Work!!! Also, record on your progress journal how far along you are. 30. I’m 35 days from losing a kilo with my 45-minute exercise routine. 31. I like that somehow Vico’s random song choices—”hate that i made you love me” by Ariana Grande—are relevant to my concerns right now. “hate that i made you love me, cause i barely tried.” It means if it wasn’t random he also has some misgivings about his own beauty and about how none of it is deserved at all. He really is favored by Esther. In some sense Andrew is also that wish granter for money. If you are favored by Esther for women (or men) you’re beautiful in a way, if by Andrew, you’re rich in a way. I’m only a little bit of both. Not that I completely don’t have beauty, it’s just that my beauty runs plainer than what Vico probably wants. 32. Make a video of the academic support of my theories and my own paper on it pre-printed in a journal archive someday (but before January 15, 2027). Maybe December. Publish the paper before December or on December. Publish this paper after you write the Substack essay on it. 33. Make an easy-to understand one-page map on Canva of all God’s wisdom connected like a data tree. Fill it with simplified shapes like the Duodenity shape. 1. Don’t forget to use 1 of 10 tomorrow right after creating this map with the PROMPTS FOR TOMORROW TAB