### Dreams 🧫 I could have sworn I had dreams, I even shortened it to a sentence in my head…but I magically forgot everything. I realize I had a Hell dream way back when. It was maybe 2021 when I dreamt this. I was in a house that was really familiar that had those grand staircases that wrapped around the sides of the walls. Then there was a funeral and a casket in the middle of it. Then apparently it was me in the casket—I guessed this because I was immediately transported to the gestalt of my mom’s old Red Cross office attached to a laboratory that looked so sterile and dead. The fluorescent creeped me out. It was then when I entered a room through a door, and I couldn’t find an exit, so I went through another door, and then another, and on and on it went, me opening doors with dread and trepidation because I couldn’t find a way out, just opening door after door trying to slough off the cold skin I felt on my body. ### Teaching/Repentance/Worship 🛐 Philippians 2:9-11 **9** Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, **10** that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, **11** and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. ### Sensations/Body Stuff 🫟 1. I swallowed a huge NAC pill from my stack and choked on it. Now I can’t concentrate because my throat hurts. ### Random(x) 🕳️ I don’t look bad today (I look like an egg). ![[February 26, 2026-1783506133670.webp]] ### Morning Pages ⚜️ I am starting _very early_ today at 6:45PM. Just reined in all of the books I need in Zotero. There are 9 (NINE!) organic synchrons with Jodi Sta. Maria. How can I still doubt that I am being read by people?!!!!! Actually, that could still be coincidence—she recently appeared on a show with his cousin and her mother. So that must be the explanation. Except “problem solver” the previous day with Bettina?! And her name too?! What will it take for me to truly believe in this? Somehow, I just am afraid of the giant Possibility that I just fooled myself, that’s why I’m not fully on board with believing just because there are correspondences to my Lore in here. It’s still really possible (even at this point) that it has been sustained by very big coincidences I shouldn’t ignore anyway. Except it didn’t always feel like this, which stumps me. Sometimes I still wonder what December felt like—it didn’t feel like this at all. So it probably really started in December. I don’t know what happened. A little over a month later I’ve massively improved. I just re-read some of my January entries and they were just…boring stuff (so I don’t understand why I was being read at the time). Thanks to Bupropion and armodafinil and some atomoxetine I’ve made huge leaps because of God too. Actually, God used the medications to do something to my brain. Something massive happened to my brain this month, probably the MCT oil too.