### Dreams 🧫
No dreams.
### Ruminations 🩻
1. Well, it’s 6:28PM and I have not done anything today but collapse into tears. Sometimes it’s so addicting to pick at a wound through music. The frisson makes the melancholy and yearning feel good, but is it really healthy? This is how people access the sublime—a heightened awareness of their own emotions. It is why I became super emotional in 2020+ because of music too. It’s just so weird that I manage to have music automatically relate to me even if I did not seek them out, they just pop up like nowhere on my homepage as if Spotify is in on it too.
### Catchy Wordplay/Puns/Copy/Bursts & Spritz 👑
1. So this is the 13th one I reworked for BOBOBEE (I feel like this is what people meant to ask in that Lucky 13 Unlucky 7—or is that a Game of Thrones reference to Talisa? South China Sea? S-S-W. Unlucky they got struck by a magnitude 7.1 earthquake 8 hours ago (it’s 8:59PM)… Gotta read that Mine book about ownership then (I tried to read it but then I lost track of what I learned and so I must start again.))
1. Historical data compiled by independent monitors indicate that quakes of magnitude 6 or greater are rare in the immediate offshore area near Sabah, with this event among the strongest recorded in at least a century in the vicinity, according to Volcano Discovery.
2. _**HABHABBY Meal: The Foreplay Special ☁️**_
“Teach me what feels nice.”
“Okay. You first.”
“French kissing and tongue and your breath, my moan. You?”
“If you have a landing strip I can play with.”
“Interesting.” Gelly’s eyes twinkled.
“Anything else?” Biko said.
“Just you…gripping and fondling my thighs and me…sucking your lollipop.”
“_Oh yeah_…but first, your soft fingers fumbling with my zipper hurriedly…”
“…and giving you a frisky handjob?” Gelly grinned.
“And me…exploring your skin…all slick and warm.”
A rare beat for air.
Gelly said, “Honestly, I can’t get the images out of my mind.”
“It’s not the images—”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s you. I can’t get you out of my mind too.” Biko said.
“I know it’s way too soon to do it, but I wish…”
“We could do it and finally stop being constantly horny for each other?”
“Yeah. That.”
“Just you wait. And we’ll see…” Biko mimed zipping his mouth.
### Sensations/Body Stuff
1. Color test
1. A = orange
2. B = yellow
3. C = blue
4. D = light orange
5. E = green light
6. F = green dark
7. G = dark blue with hint of purple
8. H = like gray-vomit
9. I = white or black
10. J = more blue than G
11. K = dark red
12. L = yellow or red
13. M = red more on the usual red you think about—really red with hint of pink
14. N = red that is dark and has hint of black
15. O = black
16. P = opaque or white
17. Q = dark blue
18. R = violet-green no speckles this time—they are like holographic this time flickering as violet or green when seen in different angles
19. S = black
20. T = blue-violet
21. U = brown-blue-violet
22. V = dark violet
23. W = metal blue
24. X = black
25. Y = regular yellow-orange
26. Z = more brown-yellow than orange
27. 0 = black
28. 1 = white
29. 2 = blue
30. 3 = yellow
31. 4 = magenta
32. 5 = orange
33. 6 = dark red
34. 7 = pink-violet more pink
35. 8 = green regular
36. 9 = red but redder than 6
2. **Take Iron With vitamin C 🍊 at 6AM first thing.**
- On empty stomach (if tolerated)
- Zinc - at 9AM
- Copper - immediately after lunch
- Calcium - at 3pm
- Magnesium - at night with Inositol
- These minerals compete.
- Zinc ↔ Copper (strong rivalry)
- Calcium ↔ Iron/Magnesium/Zinc (blocks absorption)
### Random(x) 🕳️
1. So I really just said, I’ll dick around for 3 days a week and whole-ass enjoyment to the fullest, while I grind on the 4 days I am scheduled to work. I cannot exist in this half-and-half state—it gives me dysregulation and less enjoyment knowing that I’m discontent and guilty still with how I failed to do more in a day. This will be great because nothing unpleasant will distract me from fully enjoying what I’m doing—I hyperfocus anyway when given enough stimulation for hours—I can go on and on, and I don’t need breaks.
### Morning Pages ⚜️
So only really writing at 12:00PM not because I woke up late (I woke up early actually) but because we sent off my mom to the airport and it took probably 2-3 hours. I don’t know where the time went. I was really just dissociating in the car and rehearsing all the things I said in here like clockwork (most of what I remembered anyway), muttering and laughing for no reason.
DOPAMINE LOADING!!! I HAVE NOT GONE ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!