### **MORNING PAGES** 12:57AM: Drank an armodafinil pill earlier. I faintly remember the unassuming “trigger” of the werewolf werewolf werewolf. It’s that joke I saw on Threads in October/November I think: A person tells a doctor (or nurse) they've been bitten by a wolf. The doctor asks, "**Where?**" The person replies, "**No, just a regular one.**" — I don’t know why it really said werewolf werewolf werewolf jacob jacob jacob? jeffreykoon jeffreykoon jeffreykoon? virginmary virginmary virginmary guadalope guadalope guadalope myra myra myra balls balls balls balloons balloons balloons flow flow flow wolf wolf wolf river river river = myra river yee and richard valley yee living in river of gold Why three words? Is this like an incantation? Is this the key that opens the multiverse? The fact that I have so many rivers in my bloodline. “Confluence” or the junction of two rivers, especially rivers of approximately equal width. From late Latin _confluentia_, from Latin _confluere_ ‘flow together.’ So it really is flow flow flow. OMG THAT IS PERFECT!!! It’s a palindrome. Wolf = Flow. If I start saying flow flow flow maybe something will happen. Or maybe I’ll use it in Unreal Image again. Wolf = Flow = Wolfflow = PERFECT PALINDROME = Wolff/Wolffl / Waffle. OMG I used this word in “Blank” = “waffling over dropping 13,000 pesos” Waffle = fail to make up one’s mind/talk at length without meaning/blather. In that case, I’ve been resonating this word recently. I keep waffling in my journals. Flow = Wolf = Flowwolf = PERFECT PALINDROME = Flowwo = Flower Flower = ? No idea yet. Maybe when I see or get or sense a flower I will know what this means. Waffle Flower = Wallflower Flower = something to do with my FML! or Flowers, Max, and Lucky! story So “Blank” and “FML!.” Both about school (grade school) and children being harmed, both have relatively bad endings that are ambiguous, both are about mental health in a way, both about unseen realm, both about terror (ghoul)/terrorist (school shooter), both have rainbow (literal rainbow and gay pride). There, universe. I have confluenced them both by noticing it. What will happen now? I referred to Ralph as a wallflower in my old Day One MacBook journal. Maybe my FML! will be accepted by Fantabulosa! And my “Blank” story is coming out as a reprint in April to October, I think. were were were = were = ewer = reweerew = reweer? = rear? = butt/back/raise up/raise back waffle = butt waffle = raise waffle = back wolff = butt wolff = raise wolff = bring up waffle — 2:51AM: Chatting with Indian vendors on WhatsApp to buy medication. Something 2019 me would never fathom. I mean, it didn’t occur to her that Indian patent laws allowed bulk generic drug manufacturing that’s why they’re so much cheaper and that Pinoys are actually jacking up the prices for no reason. 19 atomic number = for Potassium K. Banana. 11 & 4 — “The Shape of a Paradox” poem for GPC contest again — 6:05AM: Something is not right with my body yesterday and today. I must not have swallowed 3 armodafinil duds in a row. It is not working. Where are they all going?????????? I have something between OSDD and DID, and I just know it. Or it’s actually dynamic. There’s no way I lost all of that vocabulary from my past. 3 months of antipsychotics won’t magically do that. Something in the 3 months unmasked a layer and then dysregulated something. Maybe I will write my Berggruen essay about Anita Love and military dream and war dream? Eh. Without the anecdotes, how will I explain how it works? Identity misalignment. Why is Vico screaming HOWEVER and LOWER? And also “we” starting as lowercase? Seems like a deliberate choice. I don’t know why. Let’s see, LOWER = UNDER = SOTTO? And we = Yee/Yap? The surplus/abundance? Being shrunk. Then making the “below” larger? Why HOWEVER though? Are they reading my Logos theories about volume and meaning? Why make “BUT” or “YET” bigger? Being contrarian or contradicting what was said previously. I have no grade yet for CW 200. I want to take the spirit++ theory seriously. How do you even talk to things that are not material? You start with the structure of meaning. Language is probably the closest to spirit++ I can find so far. It would be like a user interface for an app that can allow you to talk to someone over the internet. How did my own life stack up that I “ran into” Sabby, which is really just Sebastian. And Stanley. Ang Gelo. And then meeting their “girl” versions. Almost in reverse, like how I met Angela in 2023, then found out about Shawntel in 2025, and maybe Sabby woman will be in 2027? Maybe I will meet a Priscilla or Augustina. If anybody is actually reading me right now they would not be reading me because of my erotica or personal life, but my dreams and spirit theories and language hunches? If I had more bandwidth for academia I would probably be studying semiotics. How do I talk to a spirit? How do I talk to Holy Spirit? How is it that Holy Spirit and Angel are conflated in my “language meaning bank” because of Angelo/Angela? God did say He was the Word. Life is a network of ever-moving nodes of fields. If I really had a eureka moment it would be when I probably had a hypnagogic state on Nov. 1 and heard the werewolf werewolf werewolf. I think I forgot to mention that I was really anxious about sleeping there. Something just felt “off” to me that I felt restless and paranoid for no reason, and then when I drifted I heard it. Did I sense it before it could say that to me? If so, that is the very first time I have encountered something spiritual or spooky. I apparently conflate Holy Spirit and “Angelo Gabriel” because the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary and Bautista Llamas means “baptism of fire” and also because Angel Gabriel told Mary about becoming mother of Jesus. And also, Angelo really took up Language Studies and I met him in Communication 3. I can point at anyone eerily “meaningful” because God sends “Messengers” anyway that speak through meaning. There is probably a reason why they do not appear today. But a literal entity did appear to me on Nov. 1. Wer is “man” in Old English. So Manwolf. I am faintly reminded of ALL_GO again because of Wolfgang “fixed stars variable lines” Iser. The name **Iser** has varied origins, most commonly linked to Hebrew (as a form of Israel, meaning **"God contends" or "struggles with God"**) or Germanic (from "iron," implying strength and warrior-like qualities). It can also mean "to be blessed" or "ten blessings" in Hebrew, and is sometimes a Yiddish variation. OH HOLY MOTHER. THAT IS LITERALLY JACOB (Biblical wrestler with God) THE WEREWOLF in Twlight. So JACOB was pointing to Wolfgang Iser all along!!!!!!!!!! HOLY FUCK!!!!!!!!! Wolfgang literally has “Wolf” + “path/way/journey.” What does Wolfgang do? He is afoot on a treasure hunt between the shelves. This is what I’m doing right now. “Lope Journey” because my grandfather Gregorio changed it from U to O. Everything is somehow Biblical because Iser is Israel/Jacob apparently. I just somehow lucked into this because my brain is magnetized to Israel now. That entity really did say Jacob Jacob Jacob and I didn’t understand yet but produced “Unreal Image” for “ISNOTREAL.” I figured out the mystery of IMP_AUTHOR? IMPOSTOR. It was a “lisp.” And now it’s culminated in my Impostor Justine story. Abby Jacobs is apparently now a residence hall in Silliman. If I ‘confluence’ my last name with Wolfgang Iser it meaningfully translates to the direction that I should follow my nose about “Surplus/remainder” (twins and impostors) Path Israel. So Unreal Image literally, in the most convoluted way possible that I still got there even though all I got at the time was betlog. How did that even happen? Is this destiny? It’s so surreal. I didn’t expect to be writing about Israel and Iser and Jacob werewolf. **Jacob** is a common masculine [given name](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Given_name) of [Hebrew](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hebrew_language) origin. The [English](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_language) form is derived from the [Latin](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin) _Iacobus_, from the [Greek](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greek_language) Ἰάκωβος (_Iakobos_), ultimately from the [Hebrew](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hebrew_language) יַעֲקֹב‎ (_Yaʿaqōḇ_), the name of [Jacob](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob), biblical patriarch of the [Israelites](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Israelites), and a major figure in the [Abrahamic religions](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abrahamic_religions). The name comes either from the Hebrew root עקב _ʿqb_ meaning "to follow, to be behind" but also "to supplant, circumvent, assail, overreach", or from the word for "heel", עֲקֵב _ʿakeb_. The prefix "ya-" and the internal vowel "-o-" typically indicate a masculine third-person singular imperfective form in Hebrew,[[2]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_\(name\)#cite_note-2)[[3]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_\(name\)#cite_note-3) suggesting meanings like "he will", "he may", or "he shall". It can also be taken to mean "may God protect" or "may he protect" as [Hebrew grammar](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hebrew_grammar) does not specify whether the name bearer ("he") is the [subject](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subject_\(grammar\)) (the one who acts) or the [object](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Object_\(grammar\)) (the one who is acted upon), making the interpretation open-ended."[[4]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_\(name\)#cite_note-4)[[5]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jacob_\(name\)#cite_note-5) I now see why there is a redundancy of some sort. Jacob had a twin. The name Esau (Hebrew: עֵשָׂו) means **"hairy" or "rough,"** derived from his appearance at birth, covered in red hair, like a hairy garment, as described in Genesis. It's also linked to the Hebrew verb _'asa_ (עשה), meaning "**maker, doer, or worker**," giving it industrious connotations. Esau, the biblical twin brother of Jacob, is a significant figure, also known as **Edom** ("red") due to his red stew and red sandstone lands, and **Seir**, referring to his hairy nature or the region. TWINS AGAIN. Vaguely remember an Angelo from Balingasag or somewhere appearing on Google first thing instead of Angelo from UPD. The impostor is the daughter, the other twin is the wife. So Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas from Language Studies and Communication = Angel Gabriel Holy Spirit who is performing “cunning linguist.” That is actually a description of me, if only because I selected my “Mary” to impregnate with my Angel_Hoe words a few days ago on “Whirlwind Jesus” Aella_Girl who is 33 years old. I am functionally an Angel. I also sounded the “First Trumpet” by declaring HELLO_HORNS_WE_MEET_AGAIN about PH (Philippines and Pornhub). The first trumpet in Revelation (**Chapter 8:7**) signifies a divine judgment where **hail and fire mixed with blood are cast onto the earth, burning up a third of the trees and all the green grass**, symbolizing ecological devastation and God's partial judgment, similar to the Egyptian plagues, impacting nature and humanity's sustenance. This event marks the beginning of a series of judgments from seven angels blowing trumpets, preceding further severe trials on the world. So, I stumbled upon Angelique Kidjo meaning Angel Joy (Abby?) from album Logozo with song We We. Whatever messenger means, that is what I am trying to be. So an angel only has to be a messenger through a medium. That medium is lost to history. Maybe people were more schizophrenic back then and hallucinated words and meaning into literal compacted figures. Aella is a pseudonym and who knows what her real name is. I chose her because we are homologous from different worlds, especially that she describes herself as “earnest” on social media and apparently has Patrick Star being tied up for an audience to heckle. I am functionally an Angel Gabriel and the Holy Spirit and like math, our Jesuses cancel each other out, because Aella is 33 in 2025 and I’m from Nazareth with the 3 gifts born in Bethlehem christened by ALL_GO Wolfgang Iser 2019 exposure, which is strangely related to her field of being intimate with a lot of people. I’m supposed to be elated at noticing that I am the First Angel sent to bring hail and fire on a **third** of the grass and trees and earth itself, which is exactly 33% which is Aella’s age. I am only allowed to be 33% violent to get my message across. Or that I am allowed to destroy her? Tenderly? Apparently there is another black woman/man/team named OY? who wrote a song called We We We We. Joy Frempong and Melodydreamer. Another “Abby” - **Ghanaian/Akan:** The name Frempong originates from the Akan people of Ghana, especially the Ashanti. - **Brave/Fearless:** Often linked to the Akan word _frimpong_, meaning brave or fearless. - **Leader/Chief:** Can combine _frem_ (strong/brave) and _pong_ (chief/leader), suggesting high status or power. How is “we” related to me anyway? U&I? We. UI. My “next mission” is something related to OY and 4 We’s? Oh wait no, 2 is for Unreal Image, 4 is for Angel_Hoe. I’m supposed to say something about Four Horsemen now. Although I don’t know what. Lying and Prophecy and being bipolar? Yeah… Kanye. Daughters. Being “North West” from “UP.” My IMP_AUTHOR is a daughter complaining to REAL AUTHOR about being abandoned. I have very little time left until February 22 this year. That is 2/22. I am slightly scared that my maiden name means I will be a “Mary” in the future for someone acting as a Holy Spirit/Angel Gabriel. OMG Impostor Justine is a “daughter” because she is a “small/false author” of reality. Justine Concha is just pure “Righteous Shell.” She exists in Discourse/Narrative, not in the real world, so she is not quite as relevant as real “operators” like Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas. A lottery of names. Joseph will be whoever takes Aella after I am done “converting” her. REAL AUTHOR = God = Word = Logos. OMG this is what Wolfgang Iser meant. There are “fixed stars” as in fixed names of real people because these do not change at all over a lifetime even though people die. It is permanence. In that case my “watchful” Gregorio grandfather changed my middle name from Guadalupe to Guadalope so that I am a pre-Mary. Not an actual “Mary.” My mom is not a Mary because Myra only means myrrh, which makes my mom a “King” or Magi. My dad is a related King of the “Valley” from “River of Gold” which is Guadalope too without the gold and river. My sister is another Magi, Ally Norr Guadalope Yee who gave me frankincense. **Meanings by Origin** - [**English/Germanic](https://www.google.com/search?q=English%2FGermanic&sca_esv=13d5be0ef7350a07&sxsrf=ANbL-n4Sw93Nsb1cBWmonpArU544AryJSQ%3A1767921046641&ei=llVgad3xJoT1juMPvNOh4AE&ved=2ahUKEwjP6ajBo_2RAxVt3jgGHdLKEtAQgK4QegYIAQgAEAg&uact=5&oq=ally+name+meaning&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiEWFsbHkgbmFtZSBtZWFuaW5nMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB5IrhFQogVY0hBwA3gBkAEAmAHHAaAB7xOqAQQwLjE1uAEDyAEA-AEBmAISoALWFMICChAAGLADGNYEGEfCAg0QABiABBiwAxhDGIoFwgIOEAAYsAMY5AIY1gTYAQHCAhMQLhiABBiwAxhDGMgDGIoF2AEBwgIKECMYgAQYJxiKBcICBBAjGCfCAhAQLhiABBjRAxhDGMcBGIoFwgILEAAYgAQYsQMYgwHCAggQABiABBixA8ICDhAuGIAEGLEDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYQxiKBcICChAuGIAEGEMYigXCAgsQLhiABBixAxiDAcICBRAuGIAEwgIEEAAYA8ICCxAAGIAEGJECGIoFwgINEAAYgAQYsQMYQxiKBcICExAuGIAEGLEDGNEDGEMYxwEYigXCAhAQLhiABBixAxhDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYFBiHAsICDRAuGIAEGNEDGMcBGAqYAwCIBgGQBhC6BgYIARABGAmSBwYzLjE0LjGgB6a4AbIHBjAuMTQuMbgHwxTCBwYwLjEuMTfIB0-ACAA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp):** Derived from _Adalheidis_ (Alice/Alison), meaning "noble" or "noble kind". - **English (Direct):** Means "friend" or "partner," emphasizing camaraderie and loyalty. - [**Greek](https://www.google.com/search?q=Greek&sca_esv=13d5be0ef7350a07&sxsrf=ANbL-n4Sw93Nsb1cBWmonpArU544AryJSQ%3A1767921046641&ei=llVgad3xJoT1juMPvNOh4AE&ved=2ahUKEwjP6ajBo_2RAxVt3jgGHdLKEtAQgK4QegYIAQgAEAs&uact=5&oq=ally+name+meaning&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiEWFsbHkgbmFtZSBtZWFuaW5nMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB5IrhFQogVY0hBwA3gBkAEAmAHHAaAB7xOqAQQwLjE1uAEDyAEA-AEBmAISoALWFMICChAAGLADGNYEGEfCAg0QABiABBiwAxhDGIoFwgIOEAAYsAMY5AIY1gTYAQHCAhMQLhiABBiwAxhDGMgDGIoF2AEBwgIKECMYgAQYJxiKBcICBBAjGCfCAhAQLhiABBjRAxhDGMcBGIoFwgILEAAYgAQYsQMYgwHCAggQABiABBixA8ICDhAuGIAEGLEDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYQxiKBcICChAuGIAEGEMYigXCAgsQLhiABBixAxiDAcICBRAuGIAEwgIEEAAYA8ICCxAAGIAEGJECGIoFwgINEAAYgAQYsQMYQxiKBcICExAuGIAEGLEDGNEDGEMYxwEYigXCAhAQLhiABBixAxhDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYFBiHAsICDRAuGIAEGNEDGMcBGAqYAwCIBgGQBhC6BgYIARABGAmSBwYzLjE0LjGgB6a4AbIHBjAuMTQuMbgHwxTCBwYwLjEuMTfIB0-ACAA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp):** A short form of Alexandra, meaning "defender of mankind". - [**Celtic/Gaelic](https://www.google.com/search?q=Celtic%2FGaelic&sca_esv=13d5be0ef7350a07&sxsrf=ANbL-n4Sw93Nsb1cBWmonpArU544AryJSQ%3A1767921046641&ei=llVgad3xJoT1juMPvNOh4AE&ved=2ahUKEwjP6ajBo_2RAxVt3jgGHdLKEtAQgK4QegYIAQgAEA0&uact=5&oq=ally+name+meaning&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiEWFsbHkgbmFtZSBtZWFuaW5nMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHjIGEAAYFhgeMgYQABgWGB5IrhFQogVY0hBwA3gBkAEAmAHHAaAB7xOqAQQwLjE1uAEDyAEA-AEBmAISoALWFMICChAAGLADGNYEGEfCAg0QABiABBiwAxhDGIoFwgIOEAAYsAMY5AIY1gTYAQHCAhMQLhiABBiwAxhDGMgDGIoF2AEBwgIKECMYgAQYJxiKBcICBBAjGCfCAhAQLhiABBjRAxhDGMcBGIoFwgILEAAYgAQYsQMYgwHCAggQABiABBixA8ICDhAuGIAEGLEDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYQxiKBcICChAuGIAEGEMYigXCAgsQLhiABBixAxiDAcICBRAuGIAEwgIEEAAYA8ICCxAAGIAEGJECGIoFwgINEAAYgAQYsQMYQxiKBcICExAuGIAEGLEDGNEDGEMYxwEYigXCAhAQLhiABBixAxhDGIMBGIoFwgIKEAAYgAQYFBiHAsICDRAuGIAEGNEDGMcBGAqYAwCIBgGQBhC6BgYIARABGAmSBwYzLjE0LjGgB6a4AbIHBjAuMTQuMbgHwxTCBwYwLjEuMTfIB0-ACAA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp):** Can mean "harmony," "stone," or "fair/handsome" Norr primarily means **"north" in Swedish and Old Norse**, stemming from Norse mythology and geography, representing strength and nature, and is used as a name or part of place names like Norrköping. It can also appear as a surname or variant of German names like Nörr or Nohr, or relate to the Arabic name Nour (light) in some contexts, though the Scandinavian meaning is most common for the term itself. Noble North River Valley of Wolves Surplus/Remainder. You know what? I don’t think I’m disqualified to be “Jesus” just because I have “o” instead of “u.” My first name literally means “Father’s joy” so that must mean I am God’s apple or something? But I really had to go ahead and die a lot too. Angel Gabriel Holy Spirit Baptism of Fire for now, Jesus later? Somebody who has a Jesus in their name to cancel out mine? OMG I am really lucky I made the connection that it’s not me who should seek out the Holy Spirit or Angel. It’s just a pointer because I really am from computer science and “*” is a pointer to an address, and does not actually contain data, and is a fixed star that I can “interpret” according to Iser with my “variable lines.” I need to remember that I am supposed to focus on Angel_Hoe (a really meta book) as well as Unreal Image. My interpretive strategy is really exploratory and intuitive I noticed, owing to my associative intelligence? If somebody actually manages to cancel out the Jesus in my name I will no longer be acting as “Jesus” and probably I will be acting as “Nicole Guadalope Yee” or “Victory of the People/Santa Virgin Mary/River-Valley-of-Wolves Surplus” “Tongues of flame” and “speaking in tongues” as my 2 Holy Spirit instantiations/expressions since they are both referring to Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas from Language Studies “cunning linguist” discovery. Maybe no one really knew what Holy Spirit was until I pointed it out. Or maybe other people had a hunch. They are a Supreme Angel-type that is a Person of the Trinity. I am claiming the “Pointer” by acting as Angel Gabriel Holy Spirit. The divine will of the real Holy Spirit landed on me for no reason (or maybe I cannot understand it yet) that I really took up computer science and met Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas, enough to have him make an impression on me that I kept dreaming about him even when he was instantiated as “Sam Alonto”/Angelo-type in the “Fantasy” world of my mind (i.e. the world that I have not written down yet on paper since I have no idea what he looks like in Unreal Image yet before that) who was interested in Mary/Alizeiah-type. In this case, dreams belong in Fantasy, but writing them down on my computer makes them now part of Narrative/Discourse too, so they live in two worlds. I am going to be transparent and say that I realized it a while ago already, I am just really _squinting_ because it is preposterous. If I “marry” Vico, he will manage to cancel out my first name Abby (Regis = King Jesus), my second name Nicole (Victor), my middle name Guadalope (Maria), and my last name Yee (Sotto). I will not “exist” in the Logos Real World except possibly the trace of “Gold” from River de Oro from my dad as well as Valley, and a trace of “River-Valley of Wolves/Jacob/Wolfgang Iser/Israel/10” from my Guadalope and possibly the trace of “Christmas” from Nicole. GoldValleyWolfRiverChristmas. I will only exist in “Discourse/Narrative” and/or Fantasy. His Nubla or “Cloud” would remain with him and I will fulfill “Justine Concha” fate of being inspired to become a better person. Or this is “clouds of glee” from Qahluqulu’s sacrifice? and Bis (Satan figure) “clouds of glee” too in ALL_GO. I realize I will become Aella, actually. I am still functionally “Jesus” because I realize “Father’s joy” does not mean “God’s joy.” I will only be known as “Abby.” Somebody will cancel out my gold/myrrh/frankincense connection (being borne by CDO people and given gifts in CDO, which acted as Bethlehem for a while). So that must mean I will move? And somebody will directly write something about me and my life and/or they will pick me as “Mary” because I have fulfilled my role as “Jesus” or “the Lord saves/is salvation” by “saving a hoe” and/or possibly sacrificing my hometown. I will not have a trace of my dad by that point because I have surrendered CDO and Balingasag (my “Valledor” lola hometown). If I move somewhere else, I will only have “(Real)(Edit:1/12/26)Victory of the People/Virgin Mary/Wolf-(Discourse)Wolfgang Iser/Israel/Jacob/10” trace because magically my mom’s river-valley also got cancelled out too along with my dad’s since I share both bloodlines. Theoretically if I “marry” Vico I will only have Abby left in the Logos Real World. I will functionally become “Aella” pseudonymously, or a photonegative of her. I realize I have 1 shot to cancel out my Jesus (accretion of gold/myrrh/frankincense/king status-priest orientation/Nazareth). So “move to “Sea of Galilee/North East/Pasig” to do miracles there in my heaviest ministry? Or write Angel_Hoe to “save a hoe” Aella_Girl. I cannot move yet and that is not my strength anyway, since it is writing. I don’t think it even has to be Pasig, but I have (Real)(Edit:1/12/26 Victory of the people)/Virgin Mary/Wolf-(Discourse)Wolfgang Iser/Israel/Jacob/10. I don’t like the idea of becoming a “Mary” for anybody. Maybe that doesn’t mean becoming a mother. Aella is of childbearing age, so she will likely have children who can functionally be another “Jesus” should they choose to accept that responsibility. I don’t know yet how legitimate a Jesus would be if they were born of a non-virgin (Edit 11/1/26 5:44PM: Yeah, okay, I realize my mom WASN’T a virgin)? If I actually wanted another “Jesus” as my “son” or “daughter” I would have to marry an Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas to impregnate me as the “Holy Spirit/Angel Gabriel messenger.” I cannot literally marry him because I have no connection to him anymore. Maybe I will never actually become a “Mary” and will only be happy I was a “Jesus” and “Holy Spirit” and “Angel Gabriel” rolled into one. I will “save the whirl(win)d” by raining fire and hail on Aella, to “win the world” and possibly resonate Nico(le) or The Victory in French. Anybody can claim my name to act as “Jesus” apparently. Or can they? He is not like the Holy Spirit. He was not sent like the Holy Spirit was sent to believers. So people can functionally claim Holy Spirit from anybody who matches the story of Angel Gabriel Bautista Llamas. Since I noticed it first, I am the only one who can actually “instantiate” Angelo Gabriel Bautista Llamas” and whoever comes second or more to me will be “diluted” if they choose my same path. Nobody can claim to “save the world/whirl(win)d” unless they were literally born in Nazareth like me, had 3 gifts like me, and has Virgin Mary as my middle mother’s maiden name. They can probably “support” me in the way people pray to Jesus. Actually, I will be a diluted “Mary” since my eventual “maiden name” will be “Yee” or “surplus/remainder” if I ever get married. I am a diluted Wolfgang/Jacob(Israel)/10 because of my Discourse products or writing. I am also apparently a diluted Justine Concha because of my other Discourse product. Aella doesn’t even have to be “Mary” completely. She will, at worst, give the Angel Gabriel a listen (my messenger role’s words in Angel_Hoe), but it will be her choice to listen to the Bautista Llamas “fire” and hail (who is hail?) and blood (who is blood?) to be impregnated with the Jesus, who is also known as the Word. Faintly got the sense that I am being watched again, since I realize Vico really did say LOWER referring to his role as “SOUND” as in another Angel blowing the trumpet? So I have no interpretive link to decrypt what the other trumpets are supposed to mean. I have no idea how people are using my name now. Now that I have reinterpreted the “Earth” to mean Aella, who is 33, that is so far from what the Bible literally said. Except I also made sense of the trumpet as “horns” because of “horny” from “porn” and “sex work.” Maybe they are now trying to link “volume” to ultraSOUND album since that is suggestive of baby, “trumpet,” or other. Since I am literally “Abby = Baby” and functionally “Jesus” whose names must have some significance to the other trumpets? At least I chose the “synchronic” album art with the speaker. I wonder how people are taking my messages. If people are actually not hacking me then I am completely alone being the First Angel who sounded the 1st Trumpet. This is all such a mess right now. I realize my mother may be Virgin Mary who birthed me to be in CDO to be a “King of the Jews.” And not only is she Mary, she is also a king who gave me myrrh. I will lose my (Real World)River-valley of the wolves and CDO gold river and my dad’s valley too if I choose to move somewhere. I am not actually a king if I was just given “gold.” Or am I? It means a king gave me gold, my dad who was born in Balingasag and moved to CDO and permanently relocated and birthed me here. I am just “Jesus” who has a spiritual title of “King of the Jews” because the Magi thought he was a literal King and he was mocked as a “King of the Jews.” So I have literally no idea who I am. I am a priest figure now. Who teaches, calls people to repent, and something involving worship. Vico, if he is even involved at all, is Regis? OMG Jesus is considered a High Priest. So there. The "Threefold Office" is a Christian doctrine that states Jesus Christ fulfills three functions, or offices, in his role as mediator and savior: **Prophet, Priest, and King**. This concept was described by Eusebius and fully developed by John Calvin during the Reformation. Uhhhhhh, WHAT????????? So this is what Vico’s picture meant? I am a prophet because of Green Horse, because in my “strain” or creed related to Kanye and Mental Health poetry contest, death is no longer there. I am Green Horse, the Prophecy/Lying Horse. I am also a High Priest, or just Priest. Repentance, Teaching, Worship. I am apparently a King too again? King of…Pinoys… You know, since I authored Unreal Image, ISNOTREAL, and now have edged out Israel for Philippines as “lover of horses” and the Four Horsemen. What is Vico King of? Governance and confronting world powers obviously. I am apparently an ilog or river (but “steal” in Bisaya) who is bigger than a road/street (Vico?)? Does this mean I’m a “something bigger than me has fallen all around me?” Why are all of my works suddenly related to Bible? Tomorrow poem, Unreal Image, ALL_GO. OMG my erotica is so cringy. Why did I even write that. I got really lucky today for no reason at all again. 11:32PM: Time to work on thesis and CW 198. 1:17PM: I don’t know how I got here. I just thought square with a diagonal pointing southwest, and the other pointing northeast. I am now “surplus” downleftUP (3) and Vico is “below” UPRIGHT (2). Five parentheses in ultraSOUND. Something eerily resonant about that entire album now that I’ve just listened to it in its entirety. Vico’s name means “Neighbourhood” anyway. Something about the 2nd Trumpet in that album too. “Tides” as in “we set a fire inside the waves.” The Second Trumpet in [Revelation](https://www.google.com/search?q=Revelation&sca_esv=8f86c1cd49cc125e&sxsrf=ANbL-n4VgzbZ4Gm_l1jJS--6fyt6EYm88g%3A1767929264585&ei=sHVgaZq2I7DQ2roP4MbYuQY&oq=2nd+trumpet+&gs_lp=Egxnd3Mtd2l6LXNlcnAiDDJuZCB0cnVtcGV0ICoCCAAyChAAGIAEGBQYhwIyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgUQABiABDIFEAAYgAQyBRAAGIAEMgYQABgWGB4yBhAAGBYYHkj5LlDcGVj4JXAEeAGQAQCYAeoBoAGvEaoBBTAuOS4zuAEByAEA-AEBmAIQoALzEsICChAAGLADGNYEGEfCAgoQIxiABBgnGIoFwgILEAAYgAQYkQIYigXCAgsQABiABBixAxiDAcICChAAGIAEGEMYigXCAgsQABiABBiGAxiKBZgDAIgGAZAGCJIHBTQuOC40oAfLR7IHBTAuOC40uAf5EcIHDDAuMi4xMS4xLjEuMcgHjwGACAA&sclient=gws-wiz-serp&ved=2ahUKEwi5pY2_2_2RAxVSgFYBHdn8NJEQgK4QegYIAQgAEAM) (Chapter 8:8-9) **describes a fiery "mountain" hurled into the sea, turning a third of the sea to blood, killing a third of sea life, and destroying a third of ships**, interpreted variously as a volcanic eruption, asteroid impact, or a symbolic event like Rome's destruction of Jerusalem, signaling divine judgment and a call to repentance, with interpretations differing between literal end-times (Futurist) and historical (Preterist) views. Was The Neighbourhood planning to allude to Revelation? Such synchronicity!!!! They have a song called “Holy Ghost” and “Rabbit” (Coney). And this song called “Crushed” which I like. Something about the entire thing. ultra = me? we = oui in French which means yes. Why HOWEVER? Eucatastrophe = sudden joyful turn of events. BUT? Then LOWER = Sotto? “Lower” is apparently German. French yes. Clotilde and Clovis? Liquidating vaguely erotic. Delays = delay school? Delay Jesus? Etc no period. Pregnant? I must be insane today. Who is the LGU? Judgment Day? I feel like I passed a test. Or not. I don’t even know anymore. Tides song has sea??????? Set a fire inside waves!!!! Moons. Kyle De Luna from Unreal Image? A “sound” is a body of water????????? Who knew????????????? ultraSOUND album. I wonder why “kalsada” is absent in Vico’s FB. Nothing in this world is promised. Gravity. White Horse/Conquest/Victor announcing itself? Losing more than nothing. The “road” is absent? No road? Dirt road. Interstellar dirt. Gravity inside a black hole. Becoming a black hole. Star’s core collapsing. I am ilog/river going into a black hole. Or not? I’m the black hole. People go inside me. River goes into my gravity to find singularity? Somebody outside has gravity equation but needs data from black hole. Data = my diaries???????????? I am not Murph? Or am I? Vaguely feeling this is about 2019. Stanley and Wolfgang. Wolfgang being more advanced. Cagayan/River/Pasig is more advanced than Black Horse = economic scarcity and suffering of poor? Solving economics? Road = asphalt = black. Black Horse and not white horse actually. Black Horse is apparently now a black hole? I have decided that I’m nonbinary horse. I’m both Death and Lying/Prophecy. Both still green. It was death then I became a liar = poet and edited it to mean Nothing only, deleting Death. All_Writers_GOTO_Hell because poets lie. Daughter (of Kanye) abandoned by Real Author. Except now I’m slippery because I’m southwestNORTH. NORTH west going south/down. Green demands I get a sunrise even though I’m “down.” We get UP no matter what. Rise again. Red Horse = War. Sword. Killing. White Horse = Conquest = military = ? I forgot because of my Unreal Image Philippines is now relevant. So Black Horse = Blue. Red is still obviously Red. White is still obviously White. And Green is now Yellow. Emilio Aguinaldo literally designed this flag. What does this mean? PH-American War? I am still somehow Red War Horse and Yellow Death-Prophecy/Lying Horse. Blue is Food and Money and Scarcity Horse. White is Conquest Horse. Prophecy and Lying Horse is now linked to Death because of Kanye and me. Surfaced the underside of Death, which is Prophesying an overhaul of previous one by overturning the previous. So there really is no Death or at least the coin is turned. It’s just Prophecy’s turn. Red War Horse is a sword. Killing. I guess this is “Killin’ on Demand” by Freddie Dredd? “Medieval shit, cause so much of evil shit” as in a sword. We’re now back to Philippine flag colors. Because “lover of horses.” 4 horses divided evenly between King and priest figure? Or 3 people? Prophet, Priest, and King. I am Prophet = Yellow. Priest = Blue Scarcity Horse? King = White Conquest Horse? Soldier/Warrior = War Red Horse? I guess these are roles anybody could take up. I wonder why Jesus didn’t have Warrior? Matthew 10: **34** “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. **35** For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. **36** And a person's enemies will be those of his own household. I think Warrior must be Antichrist. 4th person in the equation. Or alter ego? Clotilde and Clovis? Famous in battle. I have now partially concluded that I will “die” trying to convert Aella. My Mom’s name means myrrh. 33 is when Jesus dies. I don’t cancel out anything at all. I’m not going to be Mary. My Mom is actually Mary because of her maiden name Guadalope (Virgin Mary). LGU = Jesus Christ judging everybody dead or alive. Since Christ right now is one half Daughter instead of Son. Kanye the Father has now given me (South) North West. Half. I guess Vico is (North) North East? Vico with Mary in his name and Regis which is his “gold?” Is “Christ” actually two people? I’m going to Calvary? So I literally put A.D. in 2025, when Aella turned 33. She is turning 34 in February. Before Christ. So I’m not Christ Jesus anymore? I am so confused. Do I surrender that title to Vico now? Now that I’ve done locked on her as a target? I “died” in 2025 to find her through all that on Jan 1 (December 31 from her POV). So I am alive now and “rose from the dead?” Time ran backwards, just like with Aslan. 2026 is the B.C. period. where I devote my time to actual work. <aside> 😝 Cousin songs: End of Beginning by Djo X Upside Down by The Story So Far </aside>