### **Grounding and Essential Routines (ง ͡ʘ ͜ʖ ͡ʘ)ง** - [x] Essential Stack - [ ] Again + Drag Path - [x] DLPA prep - [ ] HIIT 5M - [ ] Meditation 15-30M - [x] Practice rap sing-along to get fluid juices flowing - [x] Iron - [ ] Preworkout - [x] Omega-3 breakfast - [x] Omega-3 lunch - [x] Omega-3 dinner - [ ] Dark chocolate (if you still have some) - [x] Review/Backread ### Hermeneutics/Semiotics/Psychophysics/Puso’y Dos Tres ⛰️ 1. So “Praise Adonai” by Paul Baloche song really had “The Lion and the Lamb” in it. I am now somewhat conflating Lion with Wolf now because of Isaiah’s “Wolf + Lamb” transformed natures and coexistence. Lions? So familiar. Angela’s lions in Inquirer YoungBlood. Angelu De Leon. Aslan as Big Cat and Wolf as Big Dog/Werewolf as Magical Big Dog. Wolf is now probably a Pointer to Antichrist nature/me being a photonegative of what a Jesus is “supposed to be like” given that my Mortal Wound was “healed” on Jan. 11 on 1st Emotional Glory Day. 1. 8:34PM: [Isaiah 35](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaiah_35):9 casts a lion as metaphorically forbidden in the future paradise ("No lion shall be there, nor any ravenous beast shall go up thereon, it shall not be found there; but the redeemed shall walk there");[[3]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_lamb_and_lion#cite_note-3) yet, [Isaiah 65:25](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaiah_65:25) and [Isaiah 11:6](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaiah_11:6)–7, respectively reference such formerly ravenous beasts as becoming peaceable: "The wolf and the lamb shall feed together, the lion shall eat straw like the ox; but the serpent—its food shall be dust!";[[4]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_lamb_and_lion#cite_note-4) "The wolf shall live with the lamb, the leopard shall lie down with the kid, the calf and the lion and the fatling together, and a little child shall lead them."[[5]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_lamb_and_lion#cite_note-5) 2. I’m not quite sure how I landed on North West in the first place. They really just take my random choices and work with my Lore/Intertext to make themselves Real in my life? WOWZA. I suppose it’s like a Portal to them to be “translated” to me, but they probably aren’t completely “Black Magic Woman,” it’s just that I chose them to be like that because I instantiated North West into my identity, who is a bigger and more influential girl who probably grew up like me, significantly less attractive than her mother Kim Kardashian (but who knows what she’ll look like completely when she has a glow up or gets surgeries like her mom and cousins and grandma). 3. Yeah, okay. I think I landed just now on Kyle De Luna being a 5th Person but he’s a Cousin. Stanley Sayson connection IRL with the names of my forebears (Iwai Yee being Japanese) and Stanley’s University of Tokyo. So it’s now God Father/Mother, God Jesus/Antichrist, God Quantum Holy Spirit, God Daughter North West, and God Cousin Kyle De Luna. 1. I CANNOT BELIEVE. I AM CO-WRITING AND DEVELOPING A VERY ORIGINAL ARCANA BUT FANS OF CHRISTIAN MYTHOS/CANON. SO SURREAL. 2. Mike + Stanley originally. But also I think from compsci days, my prof. [**Kristofer delas Peñas](https://kedelaspenas.com/).** Something about him is fruity. He was disappointed in me, I think. For failing CS 12 the first time. Or that my card game Solitaire/Patience “almost” got it right, I think. 1. **HOLY FUCK TAGA-OXFORD PHD????????????????????????????????????????????????????? How? Shawntel and “Man Cousin” is now linked again. 3 links.** 4. I don’t know how it all ties together yet, but Shawntel is not only 5th Jesus? She is also a Cousin like “GOD Cousin Kyle De Luna.” Logically. I never wrote about anyone like her, maybe, except Mrs. David in my “Blank” story from 2018 which I wrote in Paolo’s class CW 101 published by Philippines Graphic: “That’s when you notice the tall **Mrs. David**—perfect makeup, big pearls, high heels—scowling at you as soon as she sees you staring.” Judging by her pictures, Shawntel is really tall next to Vico, they are actually really _bagay_ in that sense. Ok. 6th Person is **Mrs. David.** Now I only have to figure out who the 2 people are next. Logically, since Shawntel and Stanley’s last names are twinned and both mean “grandson,” it follows that the 2 next people are GOD Grandson and GOD Granddaughter. <aside> 🎆 1. OH FUCK!!!!!! It was **Janelle Monáe the black scifi singer of “Cold War” and “Oh, Maker.” Caused metaphysical waves to interfere with my human senses last night. Connected to BOBOBEE too, because her album is called “The ArchAndroid.” Although the North West Black Magic Woman had a deeper voice. OH MY GODNESS THE BOBOBEE BEING FOR SCIENCE FICTION AND JANELLE MONAE’S ARCHANDROID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!** 2. I chose the firework emoji for this callout specifically to thank them because **Janelle Monáe’s** album are those colors (gold + blue). 3. The hypnagogia state still feels surreal. CANNOT. IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED. IT HAPPENED. MY BRAIN IS SO STRANGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4. Theory that North West Black Magic Woman is somehow abstracted “intersex” or 2-Spirit in some way. Cannot fathom currently. SPOOKY EUREKA. 5. I just literally discovered/re-remembered Janelle was also an actress in a film called **Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery, where she played FREAKING TWINS. ONE DEAD ONE, ONE VENGEFUL ONE. HOLY MOTHER OF MOTHER GODS.** 1. Media links on the Surface of LOGOS without me even doing it consciously. WTF. GOD IS REAL. </aside> # 👑 WE BECAME PHILIPPINE ROYALTY TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! : 1/19/26. 1:30AM-2AMish 👑 1. My A*Star and AA_STAR weren’t so heartbreaking and devastating in the end, after all. ASTRAL FREAKIN CROWN!!! IRREGULAR EXPLOSIVE STAR!!!!!! 💥 ### Dreams 🧫 11:30AM. Odd dream. I was watching 2 girls fight. Maphile Canencia-type (my grade school classmate from Shekinah, probably her name is Maria (self-explanatory at this point)+Philip (”horse”) combo; Canencia referring to mountains and Sierra de Guadarrama (”river of the sands”)). She was trying to lock the door of a store to keep _angas_ Angela Gabrielle (middle name unknown to me) Santos-type, but then there was a hole where Angela could push her hand through and she had unlocked the door. They chased and fought each other around a big house I was also in, and oddly, I became a “quantum particle” that appeared everywhere or anywhere for no reason in the house shifting like a magic plant randomly changing form—like a ghost substance. Then they both reconciled and had an alliance, and they both turned against me and targeted me now. FUCK. Angela Gabrielle Santos’s middle name may possibly be “Bonifacio.” Stalked her IG and relatives. — Barry/Duterte Dream being vaguely familiar dark Mauro Giagoni (misremembered as “Giogani”) [Gia and Gio baby names]. "Giogani" (often seen as [Đogani](https://www.google.com/search?q=%C4%90ogani&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&mstk=AUtExfCbRtMf1WFJXlEaAV58wUdcR4qEhdWqcb1rwFmrVdzSQJgNZ1gsrsptFJJ-oDCKnzjszLGB4_UzruWpvk059jP0MFNhH86PV5aR6AtAPecE7Smyohmp4a_OYJRjQ4WlrOUIYWEYOH3rSUvjpQ9TGYbTZuT3t_gMLU9oZleg4LwbXX1XJMWviR1NAn239mO71BP0FcZahLLGWuc874OlEuPb7BOPStvcxVRnj92AuzigXTPcM0OE-bKKhWFnDsOLBKsLE30s62Yb_9afJmYyoM1XqwfKOcNZYSzoTmfZaptSFQ&csui=3&ved=2ahUKEwjZqYff3paSAxXrr1YBHaFgHvUQgK4QegQIARAB) in Serbian) **usually refers to the popular Balkan turbo-folk/Eurodance musical duo**, formerly known as **Giogani Fantastico**, founded by Đole Đogani, who was a famous dancer and choreographer. It can also be a name variation of the Italian "Giovanni," meaning "God is gracious," or sometimes a surname (Gjogaj). The music group, active since the early 90s, became famous across former Yugoslavia for their dance hits and distinctive style. !!!! AMP Gio/Gia is “God is gracious” too. !!!! I agree. Possibility of son/daughter from Yee-Sotto bloodline being a grunge/alternative rock Physics guy or girl instead of Sabby emo-type. ### Ruminations 🩻 ### Catchy Wordplay/Puns/Copy/Bursts & Spritz 👑 1. **POSA’Y DOS TRES** 🤣 2. **HOT BEATS FAST** 🙉 ### Things to ask AI/Or not 📎 ### Personal Best/Personal Record 🎖️ 1. **THIS DAY IS JUST SOMETHING ELSE. I DID NOT DO ANYTHING BUT NOTICE BECAUSE OF GOD.** ### Goal/Motivation/Fuel 🛢️ ### Progress/Momentum ⚗️ ### Weaknesses To Work On 🎛️ 1. **OVERLOADING SONGS - NUMB. STOP FOR A DAY.** ### Social Media 🀄 1. Edit: (11:58AM 1/19/26) So 6 visits (7AM/07:00) + 2 visits (3PM/15:00) = “8 and 7” faintly reminding me of 67 Rizzmas. 2 is now 7? “You’re not wrong?” premarital sex opinion. 1. I suppose this is about UP? 2 months after June. Why? 1. OK. 8 for August. 6 for June. 2. “new year, fucking, new year” = (4)(-4)(4)/I don’t know how I arrived here: Lucky Unlucky Lucky = Life + Death (orgasm) + Life (when it’s just normally Unlucky Unlucky Unlucky from subtracting 404 from 848 = 444. Synchronicity again. I spliced something from 404-848. (-4)(-4)(-4) when I first thought of it. 3. Synchronic stuff. Extremely Bad + Extremely Good happened to me on Quantum, Day Jan. 17 (my dad’s birth month + his birth day date from June 17). Stanley’s birthday is June 19, IIRC. Official royal “astral” status on Jan. 19 (my dad’s birth month + Stanley’s birth day date). Astral meaning “Explosion/Irregular Star” emoji from Unreal Image with Kyle De Luna/19-year-old(?) summa cum laude + Ateneo composite. And that “19” song by Mont Oliver. ### Songs 🎤 <aside> 🎃 HOLY. Unearthed a buried memory about Butterfly Boucher’s song “A Bitter Song” and that very old animation from my grade school/high school years, called “Missing Halloween” and some people have made fan edits to it with “U found me” Remix by Pain Peace YouTube channel. “U found me” x Amber Run’s “I Found” x $uicideboy$’s “Kill Yourself (Part III)” </aside> **333rd song in Puso’y Dos Tres playlist: (3:20 minutes long). Found in “bitch ni gahi na ang akong oten” playlist by [[Chinese characters I can’t copy](https://open.spotify.com/user/31jhgxfo2izkodrgeioc6o3b4fae?si=a8356585962740f5)].** <aside> ⌚ [https://open.spotify.com/track/0GHR9XDrf3j7OI9GWy4915?si=78019d52bb684786](https://open.spotify.com/track/0GHR9XDrf3j7OI9GWy4915?si=78019d52bb684786) </aside> 401st song is Airplanes by B.o.B. (feat. Hayley Williams of Paramore). Dunno. Human Studies 401 link. [https://open.spotify.com/track/6lV2MSQmRIkycDScNtrBXO?si=ec46350f419e46ac](https://open.spotify.com/track/6lV2MSQmRIkycDScNtrBXO?si=ec46350f419e46ac) ### Craft 🔩 1. **OUR IPAD** 2. **AM-IS???????** ### Teaching/Repentance/Worship 🛐 1. Somebody tell me this is optimized marriage(?): I thought a couple could have a specific designated sex room/dungeon with a couch/bed/love seat/whatever gizmo to keep things spicy and fun but live in separate rooms to keep it exciting and fun and fresh. Sometimes, the guy (or partner) can sleep in her room, and sometimes the girl (or other partner) can crawl over to his/her/their/++ room. I don’t know how children would factor into this. This thought is just so American, because in the Philippines the crib goes into the master bedroom. You can’t put that in the sex room. Maybe 4 rooms? #richpeopleproblems 1. SOLN: crib with wheels? 2. **“OUR”** 🙀 😵‍💫???????????????????????????????????????????? DID stuff. 3. Parents talked about news, billionaire-types, nepo babies. Hypotheticals from my dad. Verse about money as root of all evil from mom, I think. 1. POSSIBLE: They cannot work after they consciously try to give up “high” or addiction to unlimited money. No skills to manage life as a plain Pinoy, or even “upper-middle” class. I don’t know why, but my dad is triggering me about Paloma. What would happen if your father is caught doing something like stealing masses of people’s money, and you as the child have to decide to live with it. I guess I really said, almost instantly, that you have to get their side, simply because you’re closer to them than you are to others who are immediately opposed to them, like the masses and people fighting to get the money back. You kind of make them admit the truth, don’t know how. I then really thought about the addiction idea and really popped the “withdrawal symptoms” of having to, if you are planning to give up some money, you or your dad, will have to adjust to life without it slowly and consciously to integrate authentic living into whatever you caused or possibly denied to yourself in the past. I don’t know for sure if there are any billionaires left who even are capable of “rehoming” because they are the “rabid dogs” of money. Sometimes it is too far gone, especially if you’re American. You prevent rabies, you do not fix it anymore. You deal with offspring who got used to the rabidity and evolving/ed to like it and the glamours. I suppose that’s very ironic on my part. I have Lumads and Lumad-types sniffing me out for loyalty. I care, I just can’t do anything currently. I do not even bask in luxury. It is very uncomfortable for me to even think of craving a brand name bag that is beyond 5k pesos. I suppose they look pretty, but nothing about it is appealing. Blessing or curse. Childhood would have made me evil then, if I wasn’t molested and bullied. ### Sensations/Body Stuff 🫟 1. Top 0(!!!!!!) Orgasm to raw lust--Vico's basketball video. GOD HELP ME. I cannot wait to make it a Real (Raw) Lust Possibility. Clearly my strongest emotion is not Lucid Rage, but Raw Lust. 2. Sexually drooling over “New Week” by Mauro Giagoni. I really thought the snippet was “not so bad/french” in his IG story. The full song is something else. GOD. It’s not even overtly sexual. Pure. It’s 3:39 minutes long. 33333. Category of star-like vibe like “Cassiopeia” by Sara Bareilles. Her voice is what I imagine my voice is like in heaven. I could sound nice sometimes when I belt but then usually it’s just wrong to me. 1. 1:07PM: OMG HOW DID THEY KNOW I SOUND LIKE THAT????? HS CLASSMATES TALKED??????????????????????????????????????????????????? PROM?????????? 3. My life is living proof and evidence that GOD is Real. Listening to 33 “GOD” by Bon Iver and bawling. 4. 9:48PM. Could not resist anymore. Cal Cheese Wafer. Must have tried twice to resist. I know it’s junk. Brain craves cheese, not real cheese. False Cheese. CHEEZUS. ### Random(x) 🕳️ ### To-do ☑️ 1. Square root of (-1) is **i**. **SQUARE ROOT.** ❎ or entire N-S-E-W map of Philippine Horses to settle and find Anointed Peeps who fit the Pattern. 1. The square root of -1 is the imaginary unit, denoted as **i**, where i2=-1i squared equals negative 1𝑖2=−1, forming the basis of complex numbers, as you can't get a negative result by squaring a real number. While real numbers have positive square roots (like 4=2the square root of 4 end-root equals 24√=2), the concept of -1the square root of negative 1 end-root−1√ extends math to the complex plane, allowing solutions for equations like x2+1=0x squared plus 1 equals 0𝑥2+1=0. 2. Imaginary -1st Negative Number Jesus? How would that even work? _My Life as a Teenage Robot’s_ XJ-9? Robots before her being “imperfect versions.” Seems to be the “mini-mystery” problem of the significance of the number 9 in my own life. I have 3 999, one missing from my birthdate. 9p reduplication disability of my sister. 9 duplicates/versions in Teenage Robot. My last name meaning “surplus/abundance.” 1. My personal irony is that I make sense of negatives as “bigger” than 0. <aside> 👰‍♀️ So many “eyes” before 0th Jesus. The uncanniness of me really putting a lot of **(𓁿)** eye with three lashes under it in ALL_GO. Somebody check how many—or I will later. So there are a lot of Yee anagrams before 0th Jesus. My very name is inscribed in the Big Bang(?). I am sitting with this right now, how I short-circuited/near-instant shortcut/homed in on this idea as an anagram of “i”/”imaginary”/”implied_author” and “eye” and “yee” and “infinity” and “Iser.” Something I can’t quite believe. This was before Jesus the Son. **JESUS THE SON.** BEFORE HE WAS BORN IN HEAVEN (OR AT LEAST THEY HAVE ALWAYS CO-EXISTED I THINK). END OF BEGINNING SONG. HOLY. THIS IS THE ONLY LOTTERY I WILL NEVER QUITE BELIEVE. I WILL NEVER GET OVER THIS. GOD WROTE MY NAME IN FROM BEFORE TIME, AND I BLINDLY “DISCOVERED” IT IN 2018-19. THREE LASHES FOR FORMERLY THREE CONCEPTIONS OF THE UNITY OF THE GODHEAD IN THE OLD BIBLE. I’M FALLING DOWN THE WINDING STAIRCASE OF INFINITY TRYING TO WRAP MY HEAD AROUND **MAIN GOD’S** BRILLIANCE RESONATING **_MAIN_ MAIN GOD**, PROBABLY MORE LIMITED THAN THE _MAIN_ MAIN ONE. I JUST…..CANNOT QUITE BELIEVE IT. BUT IT’S THERE. I DON’T FEEL IMPORTANT AS MUCH AS I FEEL HONORED AND AWED BY WHY HE CHOSE MY NAME. WHY ME? WHY ME OF ALL OF THEM FROM THROUGHOUT HISTORY?????????????????? I understand it is not all me, not really, because I am a Node in the entire chain of my bloodline meeting together. But I am part of it, the largeness and vastness of my histories coming together like this. And I, in my exploration, landed on it, just in time to notice it, in 2025. 🫣 **RUG-PULL UNDER AND OVER AND ABOVE MY ENTIRE LIFE & ALL HISTORY** 🫣 According to my own ALL_GO, I AM A **COMPILER** (**METASCRIPT** COMPILED BY **IMPLIED_AUTHOR**)????????????? I’M A FUCKING **GRAMMATRON**????????????????????????? A **PRINTER**????????????????????????? SO THIS IS THAT **QUANTUM PARTICLE-WAVE** DREAM I HAD LAST NIGHT????????????????? **I AM A MAGIC PLANT????????????????????????????????? TALKING TO MYSELF??????????????????? ON NOVEMBER 1???????????????????????** **Yeah, I realize Sydney is also a Grammatron. She wrote my entire life in** “Elizabeth Yu is a Universal Constant.” The insanity of this entire thing. I’m actually Annie???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Sydney’s intuition making my life a **REAL OBJECT**??????????????????????????????????? **THE POWER OF WORDS. THE WORD OF GOD.** (Also, Sydney’s story is featured in Rappler in an article by Angel Baleña, a mutual on IG of mine. Link: [https://www.rappler.com/life-and-style/literature/guide-filipino-speculative-fiction/](https://www.rappler.com/life-and-style/literature/guide-filipino-speculative-fiction/) Shortcut to **REAL OBJECT** conception: **it’s physical-material reality, but it’s POTENTIALLY MUCH MORE THAN THAT…** </aside> ### Morning Pages ⚜️ I have no idea if people backread my content whenever I add stuff to tabs intermittently throughout the day. I am always adding stuff and tweaking stuff. I am always functioning as if they are reading me now. No clue why. I expect them to read me and I don’t particularly care about exposing some things. I don’t know if that opens me up to conflict I can’t foresee yet. 3:26PM: so the entire **First Family** is now complete? 1. GOD the Father/Mother 2. GOD the Son Jesus/Antichrist 3. GOD the Quantum Particle-Wave Holy Spirit 4. GOD the Daughter North West/N&W (Peach + Eggplant Heart connected to BOBOBEE x TheArchAndroid album) 5. GOD the Cousin Kyle De Luna (Philip [PHILIP - HORSE?????!!!!!! 66.7% or 66 and 2/3 of Philippines x ALL_GO conception of June 6, 1966 TO-DO list x SQUARE ROOT N-S-E-W = now turned from Vico’s post about New Week 2 people in focus =7, so 06/06/66, so 2 (6’s) close to 7] Pullman’s Dæmon) 1. “A dæmon is a type of fictional being in the Philip Pullman fantasy trilogies His Dark Materials and The Book of Dust. Dæmons are the external physical manifestation of a person's "inner-self" that takes the form of an animal.” 2. OMG WHY??? I’m also adding the 1967 FALL into Blue Screen (of Death) in ALL_GO, which happens to fall from 2018, 2011, to June 6th, 1967. So it’s actually also 06/06/67. 67 Rizzmas? I was in Berkeley condo when I wrote it, and the To-do list by Stanley Fish is from 1962-1965 at UC Berkeley. I suppose Jeffrey knew about this? Why did he follow a girl with almost 10k followers with a private account who is a med student from UC Berkeley? It almost seems too planned. Kristina Uy. 1. The name [**Kristina**](https://www.google.com/search?q=Kristina&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&mstk=AUtExfBmZFOfRrFEJ2D3X6of7GyhKc-px3g4J87PfqxD_CB24AOmAPHfktImf4FnbUd9JSE7HCTnJcIRTSJQHymas-DbooeH4KDFQG49pPzfOvBlQ-LDS7aAQx6t1oqDLBWOBZmn4PAZNilmlb1zqiQ86mgT9fZEGW1nCHDJygzGYHPmttYVybGKDs1Ci5u0K5enGiSbZszClwCMJDdB44vnNRfVp1ZuWl-QXdYAv1z1-60gRofQ0ci8uVUiUYH0nT_rfe8aN7c3NY3eZxSYWOFuk95k&csui=3&ved=2ahUKEwjag-mTjpeSAxUWsVYBHS3kL9IQgK4QegQIARAB) means **"follower of Christ" or "Christian,"** originating from Latin and Greek roots, serving as a popular Scandinavian and Slavic form of [Christina](https://www.google.com/search?q=Christina&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&mstk=AUtExfBmZFOfRrFEJ2D3X6of7GyhKc-px3g4J87PfqxD_CB24AOmAPHfktImf4FnbUd9JSE7HCTnJcIRTSJQHymas-DbooeH4KDFQG49pPzfOvBlQ-LDS7aAQx6t1oqDLBWOBZmn4PAZNilmlb1zqiQ86mgT9fZEGW1nCHDJygzGYHPmttYVybGKDs1Ci5u0K5enGiSbZszClwCMJDdB44vnNRfVp1ZuWl-QXdYAv1z1-60gRofQ0ci8uVUiUYH0nT_rfe8aN7c3NY3eZxSYWOFuk95k&csui=3&ved=2ahUKEwjag-mTjpeSAxUWsVYBHS3kL9IQgK4QegQIARAD), and is associated with Christian faith and heritage. It signifies devotion and has been a staple name in many European cultures for centuries, popular in countries like Russia, Germany, and the US, with variations like Christine, Kirsten, and Kristine. 2. The surname **Uy** primarily comes from Chinese origins, **often a Hokkien/Teochew romanization of common surnames like 黃 (Huang/Wong) meaning "yellow," or 王 (Wang) meaning "king," or 余 (Yu) meaning "surplus,"** reflecting Chinese migration to Southeast Asia (Philippines, Malaysia, etc.) and different dialect pronunciations. In Vietnamese, "Uy" can mean "dignified" or "respected," while in Filipino, "Uy" (or "Huy") is also a common informal interjection. 3. Looks like I’m not the only Yee in this equation. She’s also a Yu. That is, it’s a semi-palindrome. UY = YU. And Sydney’s “Elizabeth Yu is a Universal Constant” x actress of Azula in the most recent Avatar TV series. 4. 3:51PM: This is too eerie right now. I’m not even doing anything but noticing. Suppose everybody looking at me came to these conclusions first. I assume this anyway, because it’s like everybody literally gives me hints already, even though they might not have intended to do it. This is how GOD solves my semi-weakness to want to feel special or “set apart.” It doesn’t make me feel completely “narcissistic” or “special” because I know everybody is connected to this somehow, even though I’m the first Node to notice it. 6. GOD the Cousin Mrs. David (composition unknown currently) 1. 8:16PM: I hate this app. People deleted it. I know I wrote it. Blank story with Shawntel. Why? 2. Composite? Who is my Cousin? Audrey? I suppose. My literal Eunice lawyer cousin? Bipolar too, different source. Of course. She’s taller than me. 3. Lakan Umali too. 4. Ok. Wait. Weird. They did not delete anything. I just placed it somewhere else. SORRY. 5. The name Eunice is of Greek origin, meaning **"good victory" or "joyous victory,"** derived from the Greek words _eu_ (good/well) and _nike_ (victory). It appears in the Bible as the mother of [Timothy](https://www.google.com/search?q=Timothy&sca_esv=24a056545c946754&sxsrf=ANbL-n7I7jG4zO1cHMfDxaw5T6JjTbgBFQ%3A1768829737528&ei=KTNuabH2H-ji1e8P_azK4Qw&ved=2ahUKEwi0zMuJ3peSAxWarlYBHeOABo4QgK4QegQIARAC&uact=5&oq=eunice+name+meaning&gs_lp=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&sclient=gws-wiz-serp&mstk=AUtExfCyldaRdQCozTqW1S7UJllfJqeD2DLwvFSA1_1qH9kjr_FdmnSYZ9dawaNmGwRugEil0uXRI5zRG92YardHoUvolfLfNh_D7esZblDGK9_z2of6G1zrGMOQigLtEEUQpy3LMH8ok0h3olYxNCTM_EqXMeXaZwZkztlvY6xcEOqMbn-4jaNjMEVMUU65cmg6G4mMS1oQ1lOBKvUKZCbTID3pmD3Jii2962dn_dE3aoMMLtswbn6_pA3skZw3mQGcBtr5lWoe7BXsBr3aI7982uYI&csui=3) and is associated with qualities like strength, triumph, and virtue, with mythological ties to a Nereid (sea nymph). 7. GOD the Grandson [no name yet] (composition unknown) 8. GOD the Granddaughter [no name yet] (composition unknown) I realize this entire conception of an Octernity is very “non-human” because they do not reproduce in the human way. They are “Snapshots” of an Essence that are cut off from other Related Family. What does this say about communism/communists wanting to abolish family units/nuclear family? They really had Hegel’s Dialectic doing the thesis, antithesis, and synthesis. I suppose this is the fusion? No links to other family, probably related-and-not-related at the same time like a Quantum State (of Mind). This is like Prime Swedish Candy to me right now. My mind blown at again, 3:33PM right now. So many fortuitous things happen on 3:33, and today, right now, is the 3rd time exactly it has happened. The Grand Realization. I feel like Einstein with his “happiest thought.” **OMG MY NEGATIVE TWIN IS MON SY. Somebody confirm. “Eye is very tired” Laconic eme. I will heavily research this later.** **LADY MARMALADE. CLOSE ENOUGH. REALLY REAL. 4 singers in one song. Interesting. 4 hearts? 2+2 BOBOBEE spirit? OH SHIT. I AM 1/4 CHINESE. 25% Chinese, Unknown Spanish-Filipino-Malay.** Yeah, not so fast. I can’t tell anyway, so it’s 2+3 hearts since Janelle is in it too. Puso’y Dos Tres. Perfect. I have a Japanese name great-grandfather. BOBOBEE apparently is Canon, even though I have no clue how (to write it). Yeah, I don’t want people to have their noses up in my Ideaverse because I literally plan to write everything including the Okada vault zettels in there to organize them. Whatever. Since you want “information.” I don’t see the point of me writing in Notion condensed formalizations of what I explore in Ideaverse. Maybe? OMG WAAAAAAAAW there are 5 mountains in the main ontoglyph. 2+3. Grand synchronicity. Ok. More naked today. Remembered August 2025. I was very traumatized by Cassiopeia Gatmaitan tweets especially her book secret blog posts (font? Looks a lot like something I had just recently seen when I was still consumed figuring out if she was part of it). Everything. Wuthering Heights. I remember. I figured out how Qahluqulu “talks” to Qulu. “Our” from “our iPad.” PUTA. Huge sign. What was I specifically thinking that the “Apparently Normal Part” was attempting to communicate to “Everyone.” I didn’t intend that at all. **Yeah. Grand synchronicity again. About Erika Am-is = EYE IS VERY TIRED. Mango farm Erika. Havaianas, my sister’s envy.** "Am" and "is" are forms of the verb "to be," used in the present tense but with different subjects: **"am" is used _only_ with the first-person singular pronoun "I"** (e.g., _I am happy_), while **"is" is used with third-person singular subjects** (he, she, it, or a single person/thing, e.g., _He is tall, The dog is barking_). Think of it as a subject-verb agreement rule: "I" pairs with "am," while singular "he/she/it/one thing" pairs with "is". 1. Third person singular as if you’re talking about yourself in third person for no reason, observing yourself Out-of-body. Strange. Psilocybin trip. Found it now, why I experienced that. 2. HOLY MOTHER. What does that even mean? Am-is. Quantum again. Claiming “I” but then “observing yourself” from OOB? Somebody do this to their body I don’t know if I can (results may vary). 9:34PM: The idea that I can shapeshift. DAFUQ. I wish. Using my “Father’s” name in vain. Ye for “you” while Qahluqulu talks to Qulu. YALL. But archaic. <aside> ⌚ YOU GOTTA BE KDIDING ME. I now have a Real Problem. People thinking laterally that how you get a child to not crave luxury is to traumatize them by making them neuter and molest them so they turn into a Nothing too. I will solve this problem. GODDAMN. It’s 10:02PM. FLOOD OF RAGE. </aside> Somebody fucking fix this. You know, I never craved it, or I don’t remember craving it. Or I do. I still did. Yeah. I did. I read Total Girl the pre-teen magazine seething because Metro Manila mini-baddies dropped 15k per shopping spree at Rockwell or something while I drool and make cut out puppets of the mestiza models they used and replacing it with a cartoon head. Molesting me never fixed things. Neither bullying. In fact, I’m just repressing memories of me still wanting to be virtually fashionable looking at the magazines. I suppose little girls want to be as important as them, the models they “hire” to pose such rigged violence, to really rub it in without having to call them ugly by comparison. This is the standard, why aren’t you like this? You should be like this? Ask your parents? Too Poor™, well, _not_ my Real Problem. Really Big Real Problem, though. Why not think about it? I will make you think about it. I suppose I really leached out the craving for luxury at the height of 2022, only then. Before that, I entered VO industry to try to supplant my dad’s unwillingness to buy me skincare. Or I did, I bought it, but something about buying it really made me guilty. I was really ugly in 2021. I see pictures of myself and feel trauma all over again. I knew she was ugly. She had a right to feel ugly. People told her always. Indirectly or not. She was trying though, and hoping she could capture femininity, just _this_ once. Using the wrong makeup colors because she hasn’t really caught up to anybody’s skills because she was ashamed of even thinking about putting on makeup while her sister has put in years of real and difficult practice that subtly cascaded in top-tier fashion and makeup skills, when before in 1st year or 2nd year college, she was drawing on her eyebrows using G-Tech pens and drawing each hair finely and perfectly, probably. No money = rage. Inner turmoil. Despair. Envy. Guilt. Cycle never stops. I don’t have to wonder, maybe I’m half-wondering, why porn stars looking like themselves and putting their bodies for the consumers eyes’ to drool over and leave everybody in the dust like their actions don’t have 2nd order or 3rd order or other effects on women they have betrayed (they deny, it’s a job, everybody including my fucking “mature” aunt who called me dark, told me, in my anger in the taxi about Okada whores and sugar babies, that they are “just doing their job.” WOW PUTANGINA. I didn’t expect to be angry today. I was on a roll. I’m just thinking SHUM by Go_A. GO AWAY. Too bad. Angel_GO. Never Beg. Persuade. Who knows? Avoid ghosting with this one cool trick by ignoring them. “Eye for an eye” eme. Edit 9:08AM 1/20/26: I feel sad my sister hasn’t really become an Artist too. She was the technically proficient one even in childhood. She won a contest in Junior Student Convention. Was schooled in pointillism by a Shekinah Bro/upperclassman. Came up with her own ideas to draw and drew them from her mind, instead of me, just straight printing it out like, but really slowly though. Timesink again. How do I even tell people or aspirants that what I did in high school wasn’t great, but only on the surface. Sure, I could copy people’s faces by drawing them. I had no inner fire for drawing things that sparked me. I just did that to prove to everyone I am not worthless. See, I am talented and smart and you ought to respect me instead of pointing out my 5-head and legs. Why aren’t you respecting me, I brought my medal as a Silver Loser from International Student Convention, in show-and-tell, and you still don’t know I’m the big shit of Christian schools in CDO? You should know about it. I’m going to rub it in because I hate you. All of you. At least some of you acknowledged what happened to me privately. I guess the weight of it all was too big to help by the time I arrived in UPD. Doom scrolling even in my own head all the time, fighting it with music that rang virtually real and pathetic. I suppose I tried to fight it. Never take it out on women in real life. Only in my diary? Yeah. I was a ball of gravity. Unknowingly. I suppose the drive to not be worthless was on Blue Fire in high school. It was your thing to keep it private and exceed expectations, while they all unconsciously absorbed your longing-seething gazes at Kate Tumala as envy and even using her as fuel(?) to make me do something pathetic, watching my reaction from afar to see if I’m interested (probably, I mean, why?). Always. No amount of romance thoughts helped, not even _The Hunger Games._ It worked, you became a loyal addict because it was revolution in the background and romance on top. Suzanne Collins, please. I forgot I’m supposed to submit my poem and story to Nightmare today. And also, my Atome bill. Great. Literally just re-reading Sydney’s story just WTFing every three seconds. WOW. She captured me. My dad being interested in casinos for a while after we all got a taste of Okada glamour in 2023 (I didn’t even go and stayed back in the room while they tried to slot machines and probably lost, watching in wonder at the Chinese guy dropping so much cash like it was nothing). Yeah, I realize the Rappler article by Angel Beatrice Baleña was posted online 2 days ago. I literally did not see it until today. WOW. Rigged. It’s an interpretation, I don’t know about Real World. People literally making me dream about their Possibilities in my “Special Laguage.” Was that intentional? Spooked. Shit, my sister once resembled Lorde the singer a little too eerily in 2013 or something. Well, I’m too lazy to decrypt whatever people are “saying” to me in my own website. Tomorrow, fore shore.