It’s Friday, and I can’t be ARSED TO DO THE RESPONSIBLE THING!!!!! All that said, I still think November and December 2025 are the best times of my life so far. All the stars have ignited and fallen upon my head. I am slowly going insane over procrastination, but I’m happier than ever for no good reason. But always vaguely waiting for the other shoe to drop. OMG HE IS HAIRY. I LOVE IT. MAN I NEED TO FIND A BACKUP GUY NOW IN CASE VICO GETS TAKEN. It’s because I can’t fall in love with taken men. I just find it weird. I’ll need to plan how to find one though, because in my opinion Vico is the apex of an ideal I simply cannot match with any other man I can find, at least a public figure. I can’t parasocially attach to KPop idols, too surface-level. Not even actors. I need someone who looks hot and is a good person on top with his same humor and charm. OMG DOES HE REALIZE HOW PERFECT HE IS?? At least, I’m just idealizing him. He is literally the best person I can point to, even if he wasn’t hot. WHY??????? HOW???? HOW CAN GOD CREATE A ONE-TO-BILLION MAN LIKE HIM??? He’s not a womanizer???? A guy like that, can go wild tapping pussy left and right, and yet he doesn’t apparently have that interest? He’s too busy being the infrastructure of Pasig, because he cares too much about people and he actually loves them. The amount of sacrifice he must shoulder to follow that path, all the opportunities to just enjoy his privilege as is. How could an all-too-unlikely permutation like him ever exist on earth? Why? I mean, I can’t even think of a female equivalent. Maybe except Shawntel. I want them to end up together. Maybe it’ll happen in 2027, so I must find another guy who can maybe be the 2nd person under him. PRISONER OF SLOTH. Story idea. The real problem I am attempting to solve for “lazy” people out there. All right. I just think they really are stalking my Bluesky. Specifically Audrey. Somebody from US visited my Malaya book review through Facebook, which means it was spread through messenger probably because I never posted anything about it. And she unprivated a post from December 9 of her basically following my advice from Bluesky that a little birdy (me) told (ME!!!) that autobiographical criticism is going to make a comeback. What am I going to do later. Read CW 198 example documents. Read analytical autoethnography. Then draft informed consent. Then draft research proposal. Then draft a summary. Then make a Canva edit asking for participants. Yeah, I said this previously, but I really said, “If I can’t even get people in real life to be interested in neurodivergence then they’re probably not interested in real life” except HDP has now reposted a schizophrenia post???????? EH?????????? WHAAAAAAT. Yeah, somebody visited my Goodreads from the Philippines. Basically, “BITCH, STOP UPDATING, WE WANT TO READ YOUR WORK, NOT YOUR PERSONAL LIFE!!!!” OK THEN. IMMA WORK NOW. ? Shawntel is actually hot too but I’m just envious. She has a nice body. Her face is also Spanish mestiza. When I first saw her in a random pic with Vico in his office I thought she was just a pretty girl jockeying for attention from the mayor. She’s actually a summa cum laude/valedictorian???? OMG they have that in common with Stanley!!!! WEIRD!!!!! I am so tired from doing nothing. I feel wired for no reason. I have this slight paranoia that I’m going to become violent for no reason, when this has never happened in my life. It’s my paranoia heightened for no reason because I’m now experiencing some fear from constantly listening to Killing on Demand by Freddie Dredd, who has some demonic iconography in his other songs. And also because of my bad trip. At least I didn’t do anything at all. I was just afraid I _might_ do something. It’s 11:05PM. Weird how they clicked on my Goodreads which literally has my When Irish Became Stone which I mostly wrote to impress Stanley in 2022. Come to think of it, it was hosted on the Japanese Amazon for such a long time. HDP is trying to tell me “Yeah, you do not have DID!!! YOU HACKED ME???” NO I DID NOT. I ASSUMED CORRECTLY. My delusional self thinking they want to read what I read so they clicked my Goodreads 🤩 11:22PM. “A drag path, etched on the surface as evidence I left there on purpose…” 😭 HOLY FUCK. THEY ARE READING ME. I EVEN THINK THEY CONSULTED AN ALBULARYO OR MINDREADER OF SOME SORT. I had this fantasy about me moaning “Yes, sir!!!” during sex and my partner asking me to say it again so of course I oblige. Now HDP is saying an Italian should be referred to as “Sig” which means Sir in Italian? What are they plotting?????? Ya’ll did you know Bhad Bhabie—I just found out again—is Italian and Jewish!!! I was not explicitly thinking of her when I was coming up with Big Hoe story idea. Just weirded out that I managed to remember to google who she is again and find out her ancestry because I was browsing what my FB wall would look like to someone else. BROS in the “Special Interest Group” be like: YOU ARE THE ALETHIOMETER!!! Why not? I am in Cagayan de Oro, and “Oro” means “gold.” So Vico just recently followed VB “Vince” Dizon. Vince means victory/winner and Dizon means grandson!!!!! And his pfp is the 2nd highest point in KOREA????????????????? WTF????? I think he is sort of attractive, but he’s MARRIED! He kind of looks like a version of my dad and Mike combined. Weird. With a bigger forehead. Like he could be a male version of me. I realized I’m fine if Vico ends up with Shawntel. HEEEEEY I’M GONNA BE OK. It’s not at that real level yet, thank fuck. Pandas collectively are an “embarrassment” and “sleuth” AMP