### **Morning Pages** Phrases: 1. Bernoulli event — Had KFC funshots and mashed potatoes. Loved it. I should take pictures of my food more often, like Jeffrey. Getting random cuts on my hand and foot. Annoying. Bluesky guy pictures are back. Also, I was on IG and checked my views, 3 posts of which got increased by 6 views each. They were all pinned posts. 666. Coincidence? Or maybe not. Somebody is definitely fucking with me. I am not bothered by it, the Satan part. It’s just weird. 7:48PM. Still antsy, restless, and avoiding responsibility. I need some kind of therapy. It’s not laziness that is stopping me. It’s fear. It’s the giant fear that I’m incompetent. That I will struggle because I literally don’t know what I’m doing. I am avoiding this for a good reason, because my ego is actually still really large despite me thinking I have no qualms about shame anymore, and by each successive day I keep avoiding my own struggle I will hurtle toward a stagnant and slow life full of nothing. So much nothing, in fact, that will feel worse than actually doing the work. Stop it. STOPPPPPPPPPPPP. I will need to be okay with being slow for a while.