Month project—get up to speed with organization. Month goal—stop drinking your coffee Something to look forward to in late October/early November—Romeo Forbes announcement. I’d be happy to even be a finalist. Check the daily planner ## 6, Wednesday Double down on strengths Determine the path of least resistance Growth Mindset - everything is a learning experience ### Intentions: Emotionality was a potent source of your ability to capture thoughts—feelings you don’t have anymore since you are numb. Start from a place of emotion. Edtech space research—Victorious Mind VO job Reread past journals Low barrier to entry=more competition. Solution: become your own niche. Get yourself to a good enough memory baseline— Ground routine—remind yourself of your goal, your dream, what you’re willing to put in to get the results you want You don’t have a baseline to know what it is you really want to do with whatever that’s left. Every choice feels like always working around limits. Not a great way to decide. To get to a good enough boundless state you have to put in the work. Get around to bottleneck that is your ability to remember, recall, rehash, not only recognize but reproduce and synthesize. Get to a point where it’s second nature to act normal—with the help of active learning. You’ve only really trained your excess emotions to put to words the emotions and events you experienced. Like anger. You are now working on lucidity even in the absence of these things. Or your mania. That song line, “Know what you’re allured to” but also be wise. Get to a point where your ego works functionally again—you really don’t have the psychological resources to be motivated by something like mimetic desire, though it’s an ember clouded in a foggy bubble. Always, you are better or more capable than what your past has told you. Every tiny step towards recovery is going to add up. You just have a dimmed sense of your own confidence, which was seemingly abundant when you were younger and had no filter on paper. Time limits structure what you are capable of. Again and again, it’s not an infinite resource and you have to learn how to prioritize things in the short-term that will give a snowballing effect and direction towards the long-term. Think hard and well about what you’re honestly allured to, seems like you’ve lost sight of motivational sources to even begin repair. Figure out a way to formalize what you did in the past, study the effects of the literary techniques you instinctively used. Maybe caring how you are perceived has a survival purpose. What are your deepest goals beyond writing and getting a survivable wage? persuasive and competent speaker have a stretch goal and actually follow through on completing it—proving your method’s usefulness—regaining a sense of a unique and personal perspective of what literary means Remind yourself of recent accomplishments—Romeo Forbes story, the fun in writing again, enhancing hopefully the publication-worthy draft of Flowers, Death Like a Kite Exercise—you have preworkout—just 15 minutes of moving Mental creativity begins with rest and fun—leisure—funny points in case joy, emulate joy in wyrmhole magazine/newsletter Somehow you must imbibe the idea, live and breathe it, that you have to go through the dread of reading your past work. It will hearten you to know you have the words. You just need a directed and concerted effort towards the right socially acceptable things to say. SWOT: S: the ability to make unique insights because of your “loose connections” — W: experimentation doesn’t always work. Goal: reduce resistance/friction in your processes