SO me and my sister went to SM today (NOV 29) after she came knocking to my dorm room because for some inexplicable reason my phone decided not to record any of her calls and texts until we actually arrived at SM. We both ate very cheesy macaroni and also ate at that Nacho Belly place in Area 2 with my cousin after the church service at Victory. Actually, I just reread my old violet journal from 2012. I don't remember much about 2012, but it's so weird how so many things could change in just 3 years. 3 years. In three years. In three years, I was able to graduate valedictorian after leaving Shekinah, was able to go to UP and surprisingly shifted out of the course my parents always thought I'd take and eventually be a pre-med. Okay. At this point, I don't know how my life is going to turn out. I harbor tons of fantasies in my head. As in everyday, I would re-enact scenes of grandeur, of passion, the works. Fantasies are no substitute, and hell, I'm not even very satisfied with them because I get easily sick of them pretty fast. Although there was this one time I was laying in bed and I fantasized about Benjie kissing me and making out and just being out of breath and tingly and the thing was, I could actually FEEL it. Like I was solo engrossed and caught up in my own fantasy. It just felt too real. And then I remembered about lucid dreaming, and maybe I could master it or something, because let's face it, consciously fantasising about something doesn't feel as real as actually dreaming about it. It's like my mind on autopilot. Also, I really, really need to catch up on my writing. The real reason I shifted is because I didn't want to become a doctor or computer scientist or any of that. I just wanted to write a one-hit-wonder which could be picked up by a movie company and then made into a film with high-profile actors that could make me some sweet money. The only problem is, I don't have the skills, nor the determination to do any of that. But the scary thing is that there are actually people who have both and they still don't get their big breaks. How am i supposed to become famous then? --- The highlight of my day was ordering cheesy thin pizza from Greenwich. Earlier today a black man borrowed my charger and didn't return it for a very long time when my sister asked for it. I don't really know what to think. He eventually returned it after I asked for it. Actually, I only have 2 exams and a retake for a CS 11 exam/HOCE, and then I'd have to collect payments, but at least most of the hell's apparent flames have subsided.