I procrastinated yet again. For an hour I think. I wonder how I'll do on the Physics exam. --- I have to face the fact that I was misled all my life. I am not a smart person. At all. Maybe above average. Sometimes. On good days. But really, I'm not special in the way that the people in my past have made me out to be. I have to face the fact that I'll have to work really, really hard in college. Except that I'm so tired of work. I can't stand it. Even when I'm slightly more productive than usual, I'd bounce back to laziness in no time. I have no self-discipline whatsoever. I don't even care that I'll be having two exams this week. But definitely, the pressure of having to maintain high grades has been taken off of me. This wouldn't have happened if I was still in a pre-med course. maybe I'd get into med school, who knows? In CDO, that is. Home. I'd want to live with my family after four more years of this hell. --- I wonder why people here are so smart. Like really, really smart. --- It's actually quite depressing how bad I am at code. I absolutely have no idea what I'm doing most of the time. And we only got perfect scores because of my two group mates. I didn't really do anything substantial. Next time, I think, will be better. --- 91 days left! It'll be 90 tomorrow. Three months to go! HAHAAAAAAAA. SO FAR AWAY. I don't even know why i wrote that. I have no idea what mood I'm in. --- My bunions kind of hurt. I can feel them slightly throbbing. I think. I don't know if I should get surgery. Maybe if I can afford it in the future. You know how some people are just born with normal features instead of these monstrosities? I know I shouldn't be ungrateful but really, my DNA could have done better. I don't know if I'd be any different had I been conceived a minute later. Maybe I'd be legitimately smarter. Or prettier. Or friendlier.