Still can't believe I'm 17 already. That's one year before 18. OMG. I'm going to be 18 next year. I wonder what my life would be like then. I really wish I lived in a condo. I really really really really really want a condo. Like when my sister eventually comes to Manila, I wish my grandfather would sponsor us and buy us one. I bet he wouldn't find it that expensive because it's just slightly higher the price of an expensive car. It would be really nice to have a condo. /Dreams --- What am I complaining about really? I've only barely touched the tip of the iceberg. Reading up on medical school articles is both a fascinating and scary thing to do at 4AM. I really hope my brain grows to accommodate all the things I need to study. I have seven and barely 1/4 of a semester left before I graduate college, and then I have four more years of med school. I wonder why people don't go crazy after years of this. I must be some kind of specially immature person to complain about this trial-esque first sem of my first year in college and acting like it's the end of the world. True, I would have more hell weeks to come and maybe even mountains of workloads to accomplish, but I hope I manage them and get good grades. I pray. I really hope I get into a good international med school. I'm aiming for the stars now. --- Aaaaand I failed the 2nd long exam in Chem. I had a strong hunch that I'd do so. And I failed by one point, which means that I wouldn't be able to get exempted no matter how high my 3rd long exam score is. A freaking point. Yup. Sometimes shit like this happens and I know better than to shrug it off but I just can't seem to understand why I would get the highest score in geology and get a failing grade in chem. Does that mean all of my efforts are worthless and the results will most likely be influenced by chance? Like the food I ate? Or how much sleep I got? Because I hadn't had both when I took that Chemistry Long Exam in that cold 7:00 AM weather. I guess that must be it. My brain was as slow as sludge. It wasn't pretty. UGGGGH. And here I am still procrastinating. NOTE TO SELF: GET YOUR ASS OF THE LAPTOP AND ACTUALLY FEEL THE DREAD COMING! WHY ARE YOU NOT WORKING YET? YOU HAVE A TONS OF EXAMS TO PREPARE FOR AND TWO PAPERS. WHAT ARE YOU? YOU'RE IMPOSSIBLE.